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Introducing new foods. Picky eater.

I have come to a brick wall. All my old techniques, tricks, and slight-of-hand, have come to a big zero. After raising 4 children, who are all well adjusted adults now, to varying degrees (LOL), kiddo number 5, an eight year old has me stumped. He has always been a picky eater. Somehow his late mom was able to get him to eat some items I never thought he'd eat (like mushrooms, onions, and broccoli). For the past three months he has not only refused to even taste new items but on occasion he has refused his old favorites (like french fries). 

I need a simple effective, non-violent systematic method to get him to eat. (his favorites are spaghetti and meat balls, plain beef cooked medium with mashed potatoes, breaded chicken pieces and plain bread.

Any reasonable ideas would be appreciated. The Ancient One is worn out.

Posted - March 1, 2017

Responses


  • Maybe these two sites have some good suggestions to help out! I went through that with my kids but now they eat anything in sight when they visit!

    7 Ways to End Picky Eating | Parenting

    Picky eaters: 10 solutions to the picky eating problem - TODAY.com

      March 1, 2017 1:37 PM MST
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  • 184
    Thank you I will see what they have. I appreciate it.
      March 1, 2017 2:51 PM MST
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  • Hi Ancient One,

    Such difficult times for you...my heartfelt love for you...

    1. This is something you have prolly tried...but, get your little guy involved in cooking projects? This might actually go over better if it happens through an outside source - a relative, maybe even something like a scout troop? But when you make it yourself and you are then SO proud...well you get the picture...

    2. Just let it be? Actually, I don't really recommend this one too strongly...but sometimes you just have no choice. I was one of the children who had great trouble eating, and my family just always made sure there was lots of good food available, and then allowed me to find my own way. 

    3. Eight years old...can you get a favourite toy involved here? "Let's invite Buzz Lightyear to lunch today! What do you think we should fix?"

    *** You are absolutely right in not trying to push the food, or any force. It's not his fault. I can tell you from my own childhood, the revulsion toward the food is absolutely insurmountable. The key, somehow, is not to emphasize food, or your concern.
      March 1, 2017 1:42 PM MST
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  • 184
    Thank you Virginia. Those are great ideas.
      March 1, 2017 2:53 PM MST
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  • Give him no other option.  He'll eat it eventually.
      March 1, 2017 1:58 PM MST
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  • 184
    Tried that. Eventually the food dried up or spoiled. I tried the old, "if you don't eat your dinner you will have it for breakfast". Didn't work.
      March 1, 2017 2:54 PM MST
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  • I figured.
      March 1, 2017 2:57 PM MST
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  • 6126
    I really like VirginiaL's first suggestion.  I've always found when you gets kids involved in making meals, they get excited about eating what they've made.  That's pretty much how it started for me.  I found a recipe book for you that is geared toward children ages 6 - 12.  Take a look at it and see if it might be helpful.  Who knows, maybe it will develop into a love of cooking for the remainder of his life.

    https://www.amazon.com/Cooking-Class-Recipes-Kids-Will/dp/1612124003/ref=pd_sbs_14_t_0?_encoding=UTF8&psc=1&refRID=YHZZYTEC7XJ5AM5Q7B92
      March 1, 2017 2:00 PM MST
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  • 184
    I am going to give it a try. Thank you.
      March 1, 2017 2:56 PM MST
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  • Give them what you want them to eat plus a really bad alternative ... fiendish i know.
      March 1, 2017 2:05 PM MST
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  • 184
    Nice idea. It might work.
      March 1, 2017 2:54 PM MST
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  • 495
    Ancient One, I worked with kids for a long time, so I'm just going to throw things out there. Everthing that Rooster and Virginia suggested are fabulous. The more of an issue you make of it the more of an issue it will become. Try taking him out to eat with friends. Offer him a stand by food and something new at the same time. Never make eating seem more important to you than it is to him. If he wants to eat the same meal every single day for months, let him. I've had kids who only ate one kind of food for months. Parents just supplemented with vitamins and kid ensure. Check in with his pediatrician for suggestions and to find out what he\she thinks about his overall health. 
    He is also grieving his mother, eating might not be something he can do very consistantly, right now. Do not feel guilty, Ancient One. You are doing everything for him that she would want you to. You are a fabulous father. You will both get through this together. You all are going through a lot right now, make mealtimes a joy not a battlefield. He could not control his mother leaving him, but he CAN control what he puts into his body. Within the boundaries of physical health, let him have that control. 
    You are both in my thoughts. This post was edited by dragonfly46 at March 2, 2017 6:38 PM MST
      March 1, 2017 2:06 PM MST
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  • 6126
    Great, great post!
      March 1, 2017 2:17 PM MST
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  • 495
    Thank you, Harry. 
      March 1, 2017 2:50 PM MST
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  • 184
    Thank you ever so much for such kind words and your suggestions. I will try them all.
      March 1, 2017 2:57 PM MST
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  • Maybe try putting a small amount of what you'd like him to try on his plate along with his "regular" food. When he turns his nose up at it ...which he inevitably will, tell him he needs to take one bite of it before he finishes his meal, and is allowed to go play, he will know what's expected of him and what he needs to do to be able to go play (or whatever he likes to do) he may sit there for a very long time, but with encouragement and a "fun" activity (play time or whatever) looming he'll try it! 
      March 1, 2017 2:14 PM MST
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  • 184
    I have tried that on occasion without success. I will try again. But I did make a big fuss about it. I need to reduce the urgency and worry on my part.
      March 1, 2017 3:00 PM MST
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  • Definitely can't be in a hurry doing this. If he continues not to eat, you may try pedia-sure 
      March 1, 2017 3:08 PM MST
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  • Most likely you have all the suggestions you could use.. and lots of great suggestions there I know.. so all I can offer you is how I do it.. and I am still working on it to be honest!

    In the early days daughter had vitamin and mineral supplements recommended by a nutritionist .. that way I knew she wasn't going to get sick from lack of nutrition... 

    Other than that.. it seems way too simple and isn't a quick fix.. but I just talk to her.. I treat her like a person, I don't enforce my will on her.. I tell her what I want and why, I explain it...  but I don't make her do anything.. I sorta let her decide if that makes sense?   

    I think she was at her worse when she was about 8.. like the kiddo you mention it wasn't even as if she had a set number of things she would eat..cos sometimes she wouldn't eat her favourites.. frustrating ... and she regularly goes off things..  

    I do try new things.. in that now and then I will buy something new for her to try.. yes sometimes she wont even try.. but mostly she will try things... and in this way while she is still fussy she is expanding her range of what she will eat all the time.

    So that's my secret.. talk to kiddo, treat them like a person, (I am sure you do anyway but we can forget that they have their own ideas and needs ) and explain and talk about it..
      March 5, 2017 3:29 PM MST
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