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I got shot twice between the eyes with a Nerf Gun. Am I pregnant?

world gun GIF

Posted - August 20, 2018

Responses


  • 44175
    No...You would have to be shot in the mouth. God I love you. This post was edited by Element 99 at August 22, 2018 2:00 AM MDT
      August 20, 2018 1:14 PM MDT
    5

  • 13071
    Not as much as I love you. ;)
      August 20, 2018 2:06 PM MDT
    5

  • 5391
    No, that isn’t how it works. It takes a different kind of gun, aimed lower. 
      August 20, 2018 2:51 PM MDT
    6

  • 13071
    You mean in baritone aimed at the feet?
      August 20, 2018 2:55 PM MDT
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  • 44175
    I wanted to keep it clean.
      August 20, 2018 7:56 PM MDT
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  • 13071
    Good try.;+
      August 20, 2018 8:07 PM MDT
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  • 5391
    What did I say? I won’t take responsibilty for another’s imagination...
      August 20, 2018 8:22 PM MDT
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  • 6023
    That depends ... WHICH model Nerf "gun" was it?
    Was it a rifle or a gun?  And who pulled the trigger?


      August 20, 2018 3:02 PM MDT
    6

  • 13071
    It was a pistol, and I pulled the trigger. ;+
      August 20, 2018 3:18 PM MDT
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  • 44175
    Nerf suicide?
      August 20, 2018 7:58 PM MDT
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  • 13071
    Yes, and i lived to talk about it.;+
      August 20, 2018 8:07 PM MDT
    3

  • 1502
    Depends if the shooter was shooting blanks or not.
      August 20, 2018 4:15 PM MDT
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  • 13071
    AHAHAHAHAH!!!!!!!
      August 20, 2018 8:07 PM MDT
    4

  • 13251
    Depends if you pulled the goalie.
      August 20, 2018 7:58 PM MDT
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  • 13071
    No, a boner. ;+
      August 20, 2018 8:08 PM MDT
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  • 7775
    That guy is way off. It takes a few "shots" someplace else to get you pregnant.
      August 20, 2018 8:31 PM MDT
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  • 5354
    Nah, as long as it was between the eyes, you should be safe.
      August 20, 2018 9:28 PM MDT
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  • 9778
    Probably not if it was your first time. Next time, use some protection.
      August 21, 2018 4:13 AM MDT
    4

  • 52905

      I won't be able to tell you for sure until I've performed a thorough examination on you (several times over the next few days). Take off all of your clothes, lie down on my bed and relax while I pop the K-Y Jelly into the microwave for ten seconds . . . 

    ~ This post was edited by Randy D at August 22, 2018 5:16 AM MDT
      August 21, 2018 6:01 AM MDT
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  • 10026



    If stuff like this came out and you were shot twice between the eyes there is a good possibility you are.  This stuff can live outside the body the for 3 days and it crawls in and around all your parts when you aren't looking!  It could work itself into your eyes and/or in your nose.  If you didn't shut your eyes really tight while being hit or blow your nose right after, you for sure are!  You better go see Randy and quick!  Don't let that kid leave town.  He might be paying child support for the next 18 years.  Keep that gun.  The doctor will need to verify it was that kid's gun as the responsible father.  This post was edited by Merlin at August 22, 2018 5:17 AM MDT
      August 22, 2018 2:23 AM MDT
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  • 52905

      Thank you for the referral. Oh, by the way, I just checked your chart too, and it seems that I've never performed any examinations on you. I can squeeze you in after Carbie's appointments, but please wait for about 30 to 45 minutes after she's left each time, ok?

    ~
      August 22, 2018 5:21 AM MDT
    1

  • 10026
    As tempted as I am to accept your gracious invitations, I must decline.  I have never nor ever will be sloppy seconds.  Besides, your plate is so full, you might need a little more than 20 or 30 minutes recovery time.  We could make a sandwich but I would have to be on top and that isn't fair to carbon.  It's a lot of weight to be on the bottom.
      August 22, 2018 7:13 AM MDT
    1

  • 52905

      [On the telephone: Reception Desk? Good morning, this is Doctor Randolph speaking, and I'd like to . . . what's that? Oh, it's you, Michelle, how are you doing? That's nice to hear, very nice. Me? Oh, I'm fine, thank you for asking. How's that? I'm sure we can have lunch again sometime soon, yes, I'd like that very much. Your place? Sure, sure. Yes, having to wear a scarf all week in this hot weather must have been a bit uncomfortable, but if anyone had seen what your neck looked like, it would have been very awkward, you're a real trooper. by the way, did I congratulate you on getting your massage therapist's certificate? You certainly earned it, and I am flattered you choose me as your practice subject. I hope we didn't disturb your roommate too much. No, no, no one has said anything to me about the security tapes from the office elevator. Maybe the security guards aren't paying very close attention. Keep your fingers crossed. Did you eventually find your panties after that night? I checked everywhere and they weren't left with me. Ok, that's good. Wow I didn't think they would have fit in that tiny coin purse of yours, but I guess as skimpy as they are . . . listen, Michelle, I called to ask if you can please switch Miss Merlie's next appointment with Miss Carbie's? Yes, that's right, Miss Merlie has expressed a preference to go first, so just flip-flop them if you don't mind. And as usual, don't schedule Miss Carbie right away after Miss Merlie leaves, give it about 45 minutes before setting up Miss Carbie. Wait, on second thought, this is Miss Merlie we're talking about, so make it a full hour before sending Niss Carbie in. One last thing, the supply of K-Y Jelly has been replenished, right? Thank you. Yes, I know I go through a lot of it, I know, I know. Ok, I have to go now, the Jones twins are here for their session. Yes, I agree, I've never known twin sisters who insist on doing everything together like these two do. Speaking of which, you'd best hold my next appointment after theirs for about 90 whole minutes. Thanks.]


    ~
      August 22, 2018 8:28 AM MDT
    1

  • 6098
    Would depend on if he got any inside. 
      August 22, 2018 8:20 AM MDT
    1