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Discussion » Questions » Emotions » How strong would an unwed mother's maternal feelings be towards her unplanned child born out of wedlock if the father has deserted them?

How strong would an unwed mother's maternal feelings be towards her unplanned child born out of wedlock if the father has deserted them?

Posted - February 13, 2019

Responses


  • Depends on the unwed mother.  Some women would be fine with raising a child on their own.  Some might be unable to handle it and would give their baby up for adoption.  
      February 13, 2019 5:59 PM MST
    4

  • 46117
    There is no way to determine this.   If a woman is a natural born mom then the maternal instnicts may take over or not.  WHo knows?  This is a traumatic situation that cannot be compared from one person to the next.  

    I don't envy any mom who has to endure motherhood alone, but some do it perfectly and some cannot manage motherhood no matter how much help she gets.
      February 13, 2019 6:45 PM MST
    4

  • 1893
    For my oldest I raised them alone, it was a tough job however I enjoyed it.
      February 13, 2019 9:29 PM MST
    4

  • 32539
    It is still her child. If she can not handle financially, there is adoption or id she keeps the baby child support and gov safety nets.
    My maternal feelings for my children would not change based on the father's actions at all.
      February 13, 2019 8:21 PM MST
    2

  • 46117
    I know.  Riight?  I"m with you on this one.  
      February 13, 2019 8:24 PM MST
    3

  • 1893
    Depends on the mother, no other predictor
      February 13, 2019 9:30 PM MST
    3

  • 7919
    Like the others have said, it totally depends of the woman. My situation was a little different; arguably more extreme, and I loved my son with every fiber of my being. I saw him as my child, not anyone else's. 

    After my son was born, I belonged to a group for young mothers, so I was in contact with all kinds of people with various views. In most cases, the fathers were not in the picture. In most cases, the mother simply compensated for the lack of a father figure. She became very protective and responsible. I must have known 30-40 over the span of a few years who became single mothers. Off the top of my head, I know of one who had an abortion because of it, another who gave hers up for adoption, and probably six or so who simply didn't rise to the challenge. They never formed any real attachment to the baby and more or less left the child in the care of the grandparents. The rest simply loved and cared for their babies. I suspect the numbers I'm familiar with are skewed though, because I'm referencing girls in the 15-19 age range. Most were not mature to begin with, but some matured rapidly due to becoming mothers. 
      February 13, 2019 9:58 PM MST
    5

  • 4631
    It varies depending on the woman.
      February 13, 2019 10:17 PM MST
    3

  • 52906

      What are you talking about?  I haven't deserted you two!


    ~
      February 14, 2019 12:06 AM MST
    1

  • You TWO? 
    You have a hope! Wishful thinking! 
      February 14, 2019 2:47 AM MST
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  • 52906

      Yes, you two; you and Little Raneelidalla.

    ~
      February 16, 2019 8:33 AM MST
    0

  • 17364
    I would think it would be enhanced by the responsibility of being alone.  But that is in what I consider a normal world where mothers care for rather than kill their babies.
      February 14, 2019 1:30 PM MST
    2

  • 6098
    Most women I have known and talked to that would not matter since really a child is part of themselves. And if they loved the father the child would represent that love.  Of course not everybody is the same. 
      February 16, 2019 6:53 PM MST
    0