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Discussion » Questions » Jobs » Don’t you realize that if you cannot produce, we’re going to have to get rid of you?

Don’t you realize that if you cannot produce, we’re going to have to get rid of you?



~

Posted - January 10, 2020

Responses


  • Jeezus - How much more putting out do I need to do ? 
      January 10, 2020 7:06 AM MST
    4

  • 52905

      There’s a weekly quota. You’re not meeting expectations. 


    ~
      January 10, 2020 3:27 PM MST
    4

  • Oh really?

    Then no milkshakes for you ...


    This post was edited by Benedict Arnold at January 11, 2020 1:31 AM MST
      January 10, 2020 4:08 PM MST
    3

  • 44175
    Stop that...you want me to have another heart attack?
      January 10, 2020 6:21 PM MST
    4

  • Ride hard, die free 
      January 10, 2020 10:17 PM MST
    2

  • 52905



    “Good morning, Human Resources Office, Personnel Assignment Desk?  This is Randy D. I’m authorizing you to have this young lady transferred here effective immediately. Yes, that’s right, yes. What’s that?  Oh, I certainly do have a position for her here, and believe me, there’s plenty for her to work on, a heavy workload day and night.  Yes, yes, it’s the best place for an up and comer like she is, my unit has needed someone like her for quite some time now. I can truly use her talents in several ways, she’ll work right under me, and I’ll see to it that she performs. No, no, no, it will be fine, just she and I working together, I’m quite accustomed to the one-on-one approach. If it’s too much for her to handle alone, I’ll look into a group or team angle sometime in the future, but for right now, I’ll break her in and show her the ropes myself. I’m sure she’ll bring about a satisfactory outcome. Please, stop with the praises, you flatter me, I might start blushing. Thanks. Oh, one last thing, I’ll need extreme privacy, of course. (Cough, cough.)”

    ~ This post was edited by Randy D at January 11, 2020 12:11 AM MST
      January 10, 2020 6:37 PM MST
    2

  • That's better .
      January 10, 2020 7:19 PM MST
    2

  • 13395
    I lied on my resume to land this job anyway so it was good while it lasted. 
      January 10, 2020 8:37 AM MST
    5

  • 52905

      Just as I suspected. I’m glad that I always paid you with counterfeit money. 


    ~
      January 10, 2020 3:28 PM MST
    3

  • 13395
    Works better than rubber checks.
      January 10, 2020 3:33 PM MST
    4

  • 52905

      Excuse me, but I did NOT rub her checks, and I resent your accusation that I did. Grrrr. 



    ~
      January 10, 2020 8:08 PM MST
    2

  • 44175
    To Canadians, all of our money is counterfeit. Even pennies.
      January 10, 2020 6:18 PM MST
    3

  • 13395
    Our coin machines all take American but i'm not sure they accept bills.
      January 10, 2020 10:11 PM MST
    2

  • 10449
    What do you mean?  I 'produce' all the time!  Why, just look at how many 'peas' I deliver every day.  And just last week I produced a total of 250 'leeks' - all on company time!
      January 10, 2020 9:52 AM MST
    3

  • 10026
    I was stepping in that same direction! 
    :) :)
      January 10, 2020 10:24 AM MST
    2

  • 52905

      That would be fine, except that this is a cabbage factory. 

    :(
      January 10, 2020 3:29 PM MST
    3

  • 10449
    Darn!  I'll never get ahead here.
      January 10, 2020 5:28 PM MST
    3

  • 52905
    Leaf it to me; I’ll put in a good word for you. 
    ~
      January 10, 2020 6:14 PM MST
    3

  • 10449
    Although you're being corny, I'm all ears.
      January 10, 2020 10:44 PM MST
    2

  • 52905

    When you pepper the conversation with sugary little compliments like that, it makes me realize you’re the salt of the earth. It shows how much you carrot, but I canned only hope you’re bean honest and not just pulling my leg of lamb. 
    ~
      January 11, 2020 5:55 AM MST
    1

  • 10026
    I think this man has all your answers, Randy. 
    Lettuce see!


      January 10, 2020 10:28 AM MST
    3

  • 10026
    Sometimes, producing needs practice.
     
    You can do it yourself but I will help you if need be.
    ;) :).
      January 10, 2020 10:31 AM MST
    3

  • 52905

      Promises, promises. 
    ~
      January 10, 2020 3:29 PM MST
    1

  • 44175
    I produce much nausea here. And maybe a few laughs.
      January 10, 2020 10:42 AM MST
    4