Are we more likely to be polite and truthful with strangers than we are with friends and family?

So we are phonies with strangers because we don't trust them? Hmm. I think I shall have to chew on that for awhile Shuhak. What you say may indeed be true for many which is a shame don't you think?

Why does trusting someone mean you aren't polite or thoughtful or respectful? It seems to me that those we "love" should be treated as more precious than complete strangers. Not as comfy old shoes that are broken in and just left wherever to be used when needed. I guess it just bothers me a lot when I see it happening.

They say home is place where they always have to let you in. That bothers me too. Thank you for your thoughtful reply m'dear. :)

With family members, we feel like we can “let our guard down”.  They won’t chastise or ridicule us even when we make foolish mistakes.  They’re always there to “watch our backs” so to speak.  That’s something we dare not do with strangers.   However, once strangers become friends, we begin to let our guard down with them as well.  Yet, it anyone – family member or friend – breaks that trust, w have a hard time letting it go (we may forgive, but we don’t forget).  If the breach of trust is too big (unrepeatable), we abandon them.  We dump the friend, we divorce the spouse, we stop talking to the family member, etc.

Humans are social animals.  Whether we think so or not, we long to trust others.  We’re born that way; it’s in our nature.  Notice how trusting young children are.  It’s when they learn that not everyone out there can be trusted that they become wary.  Even so, we still want to trust others.  If we didn’t, we’d never want friends and we wouldn’t care about family.  We want that stranger to be a friend.  So were polite to them and, hopefully, they to us.  Of course, we also earn that there are just some people who cannot be trusted.   We tend not to be as polite to those individuals.

Hi there Nightwolf! May I invite you to read what my response was to my friend Shuhak? I would say the same thing to you as I said to him. He and I are almost always on the exact same page and sometimes what he writes is verbatim what I would have written. This time I'm not so sure. When you say "....family will always be there" it sounds as if it is a given and that as such you can take them for granted. "Depending upon" and "taking for granted". Are they the same or different? Something with which I've puzzled over for many years. Thank you for your reply and Happy Wednesday to thee and thine. STAY SAFE! :)

Thanks RosieG. I read both replies. Yes, while "family will always be there" is a saying I've heard, no not always quite true, Even some family members can disagree or disown each other sadly. I've seen it happen too many times before. It's puzzling to me too. Though sometimes we treat strangers better until we get used to them too. It's sometimes I guess how our nature works for some reason. It's just a saying really, doesn't mean it's always so true. I wish you a grand and safe day as well! :)