.
Yes, definitely.
I'm starting to think it is a rarity, a rare rarity to find someone who would take a disagreement as an opportunity to learn, rather than a chance to get upset and take things personal. Besides you and maybe two more, I have not been able to have a disagreement without them getting upset. It's a very hard to find quality.
I think those who operate emotionally and follow a rigid programmed script cannot disagree without taking it personally. It is as if you are attacking their character. Disagreement is simply exchanging different
ideas. That is how we learn how others think. If we are really lucky they will take the time to let us know WHY they think that way. Insult is not an essential part of that dialogue. Those who are really interested in what people think and why are always up for extended conversations that are respectful, polite, civil. Sometimes they are even cordial. Those who have no interest in anything but promulgating partisan views are the ones who indulge themselves in insult. I avoid them. They are a total waste of my time. Thank you for your reply NHP. You would be surprised at the number of folks who feel as I do. You just have to look for them! :)
Agree. :)
Disagreement can have lots going for it - learning to understand better how the other thinks, other points of view, and discovering how to one's own thinking.
Conversation is one of the main ways we get to know each other.
The only way if we're not meeting in real life.
I know, they don't realize that everything would be so much better if they just agree with me. Right ? : )
Wel, I might play devil's advocate and pick a bone with you just to see what happens! ;)
If it actually is polite (often times it isn't, and that obviously sets a negative tone to begin with), I think that many people are inflexible and overly sensitive. The other thing that I've learned is that when people become defensive about something, it's usually an indicator that they, themselves. aren't all together comfortable with their position. If a person is very comfortable with what they think, believe, do, then there's no need to get defensive. I definitely agree that learning new things and different perspectives is a positive result of conversation.
You are right, Rosie. Polite disagreement indeed has a lot going for it. I find it easy to accept people's differences when they disagree in a civilised manner, even if I don't actually learn anything I didn't previously know. On the other hand, people who are not so polite when they disagree only cause me to react by becoming more stubborn and set in stone than I was before. Is that what those people want? If not, why else are they rude and arrogant when they disagree?
Happy Thursday, Rosie!:)
Precisely! Some people stay closed off and after years of conversation you know nothing about their personal lives. But you do learn what they think and how think and interact. Thank you for your reply hartfire and Happy Thursday.
Without going off half-cocked looking for a fight. Thank you for your reply Nelly and Happy Thursday.
Thank you for your reply SA and Happy Thursday. It's easy to recognize polite and im. I avoid interacting with those who aren't. If they are new to me and in
sult I just avoid them in the future. It's easy to do. I don't read what they post . You get one chance with me and if you blow it by being insulting that's it. If people are not articulate enough to convey what they have to say with civility I move on. :)
I don't interact with those people Andy. They get one chance. If they are rude/insulting I simply never read another post from them. I expect people to be civil. Cordial is nice but civil is essential. If they are unable to be civil I am unable to interact with them and I don't. Thank you for your reply and Happy Thursday to thee! :)
Happy Thursday to you, too!
Sadly, there are many people who like to argue just for the sake of argument. I genuinely feel bad for them.
Did you find me impolite over the lightning issue?
Well you did, remember our last exchange? When you disagreed with me? I didn't flip out too badly, did I? : ).
Actually not at all, not even slightly.
Then I tested you, with a real issue, and it was the same.
Amazing how good it feels to be able to be real with someone, scary but good.
Thanks m'dear and Happy Friday. Well ya see I'm 78 and I don't have any
time to waste. I have to make each moment count so arguing with anyone serves no purpose in my life. Exchanging views does. I try to make the use of my time as best I can SA because I don't know how much of it is left. I think I' ll live into my triple-digit years. Both my mom and her mom lived to their mid-90's and I am so much healthier than they were at my age. But you never know. If I happen to be out and about and some deranged person armed with a weapon and a lot of hate takes people out I could be one of them. I don't think about it when I venture out but that possibility exists. As does the possibility of being hit by a drunk driver. So the moral is enjoy each moment and don't waste time on those who aren't worth it! :)
Of course, were friends.
It's ok if it's scary. Just be free. That's all. You're already yourself. Thats the easy part.
It is truly my honor.Thank you.
:) :) :)
That is the point, Rosie. How wonderful if it really always went that way.
