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Discussion » Statements » Rosie's Corner » When you are angry with someone do you stick to the NOW or do you reach back in the past and dredge up past angers?

When you are angry with someone do you stick to the NOW or do you reach back in the past and dredge up past angers?

If what angered you NOW gets buried in a litany of old arguments how much weight do you think it will carry? What kind of an impression will it make when you BURY THE LEAD in yesterday's news? Well you will definitely force your target to tune out and turn off.  Not smart.

Posted - September 8, 2019

Responses


  • 10749
    When we're angry, most all of us tend to reach into the past to dredge up old arguments.  We somehow think that by resurrecting them that they'll somehow help to bolster our present case.  Unfortunately, doing so usually has the opposite effect.  Old wounds reopened tend to be sorer than fresh wounds.
      September 8, 2019 9:50 AM MDT
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  • 113301
    My mom did that so I try very hard NOT TO DO IT TOO! Each time I'd have to listen to a lengthening litany of my wrongdoings. It did wear thin but she didn't know any better and the good thing is I learned what NOT TO DO as a parent and tried my level best not to inflict that on my son. I was not a perfect mom by any means but I think I did better for him than she did for me. She did her best. I did my best. That's all you can do. Thank you for your reply Shuhak. Here's what I think should happen. If you are with someone who makes you angry all the time and you keep a list of the flare ups and what caused them then you are the crazy one for staying with such a person. Just my opinion. Of course a young girl doesn't leave her parents. But a grown woman can leave a spouse or a mate who does that. So can a grown man. :) This post was edited by RosieG at September 8, 2019 2:02 PM MDT
      September 8, 2019 10:48 AM MDT
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  • 46117
    That notion is silly.  Yet that is what Trump behaves like each and every day.  Look at what he does with Obama.  It's legend.  It's embarrassing and I have NO idea what Obama thinks.  I would love to hear him get up on stage and TEAR this jerk apart once and for all.  

     I forgive and forget just like people do for me.  Simple.

    People who fret and try to get even make a total ass of themselves.  OR WORSE.   This post was edited by WM BARR . =ABSOLUTE TRASH at September 8, 2019 12:50 PM MDT
      September 8, 2019 10:57 AM MDT
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  • 19937
    I can forgive and forget if what made me angry was not something major and if it was a family member.  However, I can also be a grudge holder if the intent was maliciously hurtful/harmful.  I give up that grudge if and when I can no longer remember what made me angry.  Sometimes, that can be never or until death.
      September 8, 2019 12:53 PM MDT
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