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Randy D
Discussion » Questions » Life and Society » Years ago girls were told to build up male egos/don't outshine guys/play dumb/feign ineptness. They don't STILL do that do they?
RosieG

Years ago girls were told to build up male egos/don't outshine guys/play dumb/feign ineptness. They don't STILL do that do they?

We were told boys don't like smart girls and men don't like smart women. I think smart men ALWAYS liked smart women. It's the other ones who felt threatened and inadequate. But that was all long ago and far away in a different time. Now women don't have to lie or fake or pretend. And we can all be honest with one another 24/7. Right?

Posted - November 17, 2016
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Responses


  • 7938
    The smart women still do. 

    This probably sounds bad, but I think it's true. I've read a ton of studies on women and the perception of women in business. A woman who plays up to her strengths or is assertive is still considered a b*tch. 

    Here's a cool study from Pew Research:  http://www.pewsocialtrends.org/2015/01/14/chapter-2-what-makes-a-good-leader-and-does-gender-matter/

    Perception is that women are better with social and interpersonal skills, while men are better with being decisive, making profitable negotiations, and taking risks. So, it's no surprise that another part of the survey covered who would be better leaders in specific industries. Women got hospitals. Men got things like oil companies and computer software companies by a wide margin. 29% of people said men would be better leaders in a computer software company. 29%?!?

    And, more than half of the people surveyed thought men made better leaders overall. 

    At any rate, if intelligence is the first trait that's noticed in a woman, it comes at the cost of something else- namely a social or interpersonal trait. Ergo, she's a b*tch. 

    This is another fun non-scientific poll: http://fortune.com/2016/11/17/trump-globalization/

    The author specifically checked tech comapnies and how men and women were reviewed. It turns out that in his poll, women were critiqued on personality behaviors, while men weren't. Moreover, the women were often told they were too bold or abrasive and instructed to let others have the floor more or to "pipe down." So, you can be smart, but if you're a woman, it's still better to be quiet about it.

    As a woman, you can, and should, be proud of your intelligence, but it will not get you ahead in business. You still have to fine tune your interpersonal skills and put those first or you won't be considered likeable or capable. 

    FYI- this bias exists in men and women, so it's not just insecure males who judge women based on EQ/ social traits first.


      November 17, 2016 11:27 AM MST
    1

  • 113301
    Wow honey! This is way more than I bargained for and I thank you very much for taking the time and care to provide it. So our choice boils down to this...we can be honest and whom we are at the cost of being thought of as a bit**! Well I made my choice decades ago. I do not dumb down for anyone. I think dumbing down insults people. It assumes they are too dumb to understand you.  Well they aren't. I guess sexism will never go away though in all its glorious permutations and manifestations. How sad that? Happy Friday JA! :) ((hugs))
      November 18, 2016 5:37 AM MST
    1

  • 500
    I hope not. Nothing worse than a conversation with a clueless person.
    Wish women would say what they think rather than what they think I want to hear. Really annoying.
      November 17, 2016 11:29 AM MST
    0