Wouldn't it be grand if there was a babel fish translator for animals?

My dog has lots of different sounding barks and I think it would be neat to be able to understand exactly what he was saying with each bark. Like if he was chasing a deer and barking at it some of the barks or combinations of barks might = a swear word in dog language. Then I could set the translator to from human to dog and let my dog know that the next time I hear him swearing he's going to have to put a quarter in the swear jar. I think a device like that would be a hoot but it would also be a good thing to have - like I bet dolphins have some interesting things they could tell us about the oceans. Cheers!