You have a universe to save? You are solving one of the world's greatest mysteries? Or maybe there is some deeper spiritual reason why you just *have* to be up, you just don't know it yet.
I don't have one to rub out. One getting rubbed is a peenie.
I hear tell that women have electronic devices to do that trick. I am not interested. I'd rather control urges that threaten to control me. Food, sex, coffee.