but we dont choose all in life......
my mom lives in an appartment at 3rd floor, and id be better somewhere else...
but i dont think its a good idea to return live outdoors..... it could not be too bad , but i havent done it yet cuz people gave me things to do , and if i go live outdoors and flee everything, im scare that they call the cops on me to try to find me or wahtever..
i dunno how to deal with the neighbor under too...
it might be better a bit; i storaged some things so they arent seen, which is fine.. almost all tho . anyways.
the neighbor under us, well, shes a woman, and she seems kind and all that, but i dont think it goes well that i live above her... i know she aint stupid, and she knows i live above.
the thing is , if i do nothin gmuch of my days, if i havent went outside, i feel bad when the neighbor under me is here, cuz i know she suspect i havent went out , and anyways, its harder for me to go out . not harder, but i have to prepare myself a bit mentally and etc.
its a long rambling here anyways.... but i have to say, altho i get welfare money each month, i dont rent an appartment for myself, mainly cuz i know it probably wont work... i dont want to deal with people, a owner of the block, and what if they dont want me there, etc etc
so im obliged to live at mom appartment... and she doesnt really help me in my life.
i dont like dealing with the neighbor under, because im scared, she already called the cops on me for a stupid reason ( she bangs the walls/floor, yet when i do it to tell her to shut up , she calls the cops on me ).
i just dont like dealin with cops... the reason is i was arrested last year for a stupid reason, and they did a profile of me with a face picture and all that, and i just dont want the police to have my face picture in their files, and all that.
i just want things to go better......
i dont feel good living here, cuz even when i get outside to do something i need, i know ill have to return back to this place to live there, and i dont like that place.... there less intimacy , as i said before, than in the past,,,, i guess because of the neighbor under , she seems wary of noises, and so because of that, i try myself to make less noises, to refrain myself to do stuffs just because of that, and i dont like that....
for example if i wanna work with a powertool, i cant because it would make big noise, and she would bang the walls or sumthing, which i really hat ebecause it is harrassment, but if i defend myself she calls the cops
Thriftymaid 