I'll bet you wish you listened to me when I posted this.
https://www.autom.com/category/new-arrivals-sacramental-and-seasonal?c=RW160616A&wsptrack=msn|Christmas+July+|gifts|christmas%20in%20july%20sale&utm_source=bing&utm_medium=cpc&utm_campaign=Search%20Christmas%20July&utm_term=christmas%20in%20july%20sale&utm_content=gifts
Christmas doesn´t matter to me, so I pass on this one.
Let's hope not. It's July for Christ's sake.
Washington DC – President Trump attacked IMPEACH: The Card Slap Game today. He is threatening the maker, Stable Genius Gaming, with a variety of government actions.
White House insiders state the President first found out about the game yesterday. After enjoying a #1 McDonald’s meal for lunch, the commander-in-chief sauntered about the White House for a few minutes. Aides state Trump likes to wander about before sitting down and watching FOX News and reruns of Two Broke Girls.
However, Donald’s routine took a left turn when he walked into youngest son Barron and older brother Eric playing IMPEACH: The Card Slap Game.
”What in the name of Gordon Gekko is this!” Trump the Elder thundered.
At exactly the same moment Eric slapped the pile of cards and yelled, “I impeach Dad! Yaaaaaaaaaaaay!”
Eric and his father shared an awkward moment.
”I won the first 20 games. I thought I’d let Eric win one,” Barron confessed.
Knowing he was caught red handed, Eric attempted to paint a picture of how the Internet tricked him. He was looking online to see if the Democrats were moving to impeach the bestest President Trump ever. What Google gave him was an ad for the card game. Mesmerized, Eric clicked. And Stable Genius Gaming had him hook, line, and sucker.
You should read the online reviews, Dad. They’re funny,” Eric explained.
After sending Eric to his room, the President spent the rest of his day fuming. The game cards had funny pictures of him. OF HIM. And who were they to print real facts (i.e., fake news) about his administration? Someone had to suffer. Bigly.
Within minutes the enraged chief executive tweeted in all caps: “THE RIGGED AND CORRUPT CARD GAME IS THE ENEMY OF THE PEOPLE!”
Anonymous White House sources state the President is weighing all options. The military talked him out of launching a nuclear missile at the makers of IMPEACH. After all, the company is in the United States of America.
The IRS may get involved and do a surprise audit of the company. Or perhaps some Russian operative may place radioactive powder all through their office? That would be nasty.
The staff at Stable Genius Gaming state they are ready. If the Justice Department and the IRS attack them, well, they have another product in the works that will pay off their legal bills. It’s a board game and called Trump and Porn Stars.
Andrew Canard is CEO of the company. He has high hopes for the game. “In the game you play an advisor to Trump. The goal is to silence as many porn stars as possible. It’s going to sell like hot cakes! Hot cake porn!”