Would you rather date someone just like you or someone completely different?

It sounds like you've got a good mix going.
The right amount commonality and differences.
Maybe that's the key?
I just go on these dating sites and I saw an asian woman the other day who listed all of her adventures and travels and that she's looking for a similar mate.
Somewhere in her long paragraph she said that she also wants someone who can kiss good.
Our lives are different and we don't have much in common, but I like to kiss and I'd like to kiss her.
Shouldn't that be enough?
Everything else is just extra.
I could learn to travel and paint and do yoga like her and she could learn about shovelling snow and driving with me to take my child to school.
I just feel like people on dating sites should be more open-minded.




This post was edited by Summer at June 12, 2018 5:11 AM MDT

Sounds pretty complicated huh?
It's amazing how many factors go into deciding whether we are compatible.
I think we just do it naturally.
We react to the other person's personality traits as we get to know them.
Another question then would be "How do we know what we want before we find it?"
I don't think people do.
I think they think they do.
I think you meet someone and you are attracted and then all of the sudden what they are is what you want.
Are dating sites going against nature?
What an ass backwards way to find love.


This post was edited by Summer at June 12, 2018 10:41 AM MDT

I think dating and internet social or chat sites can help people get together.  Which is good.  But of course you need the time really together to get to know one another which can't be done chatting on the net or texting.  My generation was more social so we got out and met and interacted with more people instead of staying at home behind our computers. Some dating sites try and match people based upon similarities or compatibility to what others are looking for.  Some just provide introductions to people in your general age group which is fair enough as well I can remember years ago listening to a radio dating program where 90% pf all the people who were on said they wanted the same things! Of course you are exactly right for so many people - they have no idea what they really want.  Or they say they want things and turns out they really want other things.  So only being together can you sort all of that out as well as learning about each other  And anyway relationships are hard enough on their own because there are all kinds of underlying expectations, resentments that build up, inability to communicate and so on.

Before I met my husband I used a dating site and met some very decent men some of whom I am sure I could have had at least a decent life with if they were interested in me. I was 53. But meeting Gerry there was just such an immediate connection we both could feel and we were talking and talking with each other and understanding each other and it was like a dream come true. I think its possible for primarily sexual attractions to lead to something more deeper and lasting but  really think much better to go for someone you love spending as much time with as possible and not just in bed!  My husband is my best friend. Had I chosen when I was much younger I don't know as I would have known enough to look for a friend. Our emphases often change as we mature and what was once important to us becomes less important. 

I think it is nice to find your best friend like you did.
I feel like I've found that as well, but after 30 life gets so complicated with jobs, kids and marriages etc.
I can't necessarily or realistically be with that person.
Lately being on dating sites has sparked my interest in the unknown.
I almost have an attraction to women who are completely different.
Maybe just more of a curiosity.
Like if I can't be with my best friend because of complications then I would rather just date women that constantly surprise me and Just have a blast meeting them and getting a glimpse into their worlds.

To each his own.