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The principal purpose of leaf blowers is to annoy the neighbours... moreThe principal purpose of leaf blowers is to annoy the neighbours. Silencers would defeat the purpose.Use a broom.
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Sometimes it's both - it's always a condition, but it can be cau... moreSometimes it's both - it's always a condition, but it can be caused by a disease or be an inherited genetic condition. I'm not asthmatic but my daughter is. Not curable but manageable, she carries an inhaler on her at all times, as it can strike without warning.Hers is genetic, it's on both sides of the family. My grandmother died from an asthma-related illness, and Maureen's elder sister had to leave Sydney - the smog was killing her.
This post was edited by Slartibartfast at September 16, 2019 3:03 AM MDT
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Standin'. Not lyin'.
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Ice creamVodka and Red BullBlack hoodieThelma and LouiseAll of M... moreIce creamVodka and Red BullBlack hoodieThelma and LouiseAll of Me (John Legend)Randy D
This post was edited by Slartibartfast at September 16, 2019 1:21 AM MDT
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I play chess with a friend from Prague. He's a Czech mate.
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She's a single mum of 2, neither of them mine. I couldn't possib... moreShe's a single mum of 2, neither of them mine. I couldn't possibly be as happy and comfortable as I am today, because she's not my better half.
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Being Larry.
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Nope. The only one in the family who still smokes is my daughter... moreNope. The only one in the family who still smokes is my daughter.I quit for financial reasons. Tobacco prices in Australia are extortionate.
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So a known carcinogen is bad for you. Who knew?
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Ah, c'maahn. That one was obvious.
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Thou art God. Do you grok?
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He's certainly more likely to pour mayo down the sink than eat i... moreHe's certainly more likely to pour mayo down the sink than eat it. Sinko de Mayo.
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Still do. I (usually) hit it. Rarely exceed it by enough to scor... moreStill do. I (usually) hit it. Rarely exceed it by enough to score bonuses, but enough to keep from being fired.
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The Ents were the protectors of the trees.
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Aussies are awful coffee snobs. Do you know the one place in the... moreAussies are awful coffee snobs. Do you know the one place in the world where Starbucks FAILED? We won't pay high prices for bad coffee.
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I asked my doctor how my prognosis was.He said, "Not good. Mercu... moreI asked my doctor how my prognosis was.He said, "Not good. Mercury is in Uranus."I said, "I don't believe in that astrological junk."He replied, "Neither do I. My thermometer just broke."
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I believe so. Married thirty years, four kids (two stillborn), t... moreI believe so. Married thirty years, four kids (two stillborn), three grandkids so far ...
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The biggest scam was the one that it would be a bad thing. Every... moreThe biggest scam was the one that it would be a bad thing. Every developed nation in the world has some form of nationalized health care - EXCEPT the US.
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Happy and frightened at the same time. I was nineteen and didn't... moreHappy and frightened at the same time. I was nineteen and didn't think I was anywhere near being ready. And I knew my ultra-orthodox Catholic mother would hit the ceiling - which she did.We were married less than a week after my 20th birthday. When our daughter arrived, I grew up almost immediately. And the first time the baby was placed in mother's arms, my wife was transfigured - I was vouchsafed a glimpse of an angel.
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Which is why Kanye and His Royal Orangeness fit so well together... moreWhich is why Kanye and His Royal Orangeness fit so well together. A jackass and a horse's a$$. Birds of a feather.
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I have a fear ofAAAAAUGGHHHH!
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Myself. I'm clumsy, tripped and fell getting out of the shower.
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I'm a straight dude, so I'm safe - but I'm sure this would work ...
This post was edited by Slartibartfast at September 12, 2019 8:15 PM MDT
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A brisk walk from home to the railway station. I'm on my way to work.
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Sleepy. She's going through menopause, so she's perpetually tired.
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The Little Mermaid. Everybody, from her dad and sisters, to her ... moreThe Little Mermaid. Everybody, from her dad and sisters, to her friends Flounder and Sebastian, told her to stay put under the sea.But noooo, she had to have the d.
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Carn E Vaugh and the Vegans
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I check almost everything. I was raised to question.
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Close as they'll ever get to it. They'll never get into the real... moreClose as they'll ever get to it. They'll never get into the real one. Matt 19:24.
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Half of a McDonald's logo
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On a Eurocentric globe or flat map, cardinal North faces the top... moreOn a Eurocentric globe or flat map, cardinal North faces the top. Ergo, Australia is "under" most others. The term has been in use since the mid-19th century, and was given momentum by the chunder from down under, Men At Work, and their anthemic homage to Vegemite sandwiches.
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Sugar comes from cane, which is a grass. Still a vegetable.
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AM, of course!
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You posted this 7 hours ago. I was asleep, it was already the we... moreYou posted this 7 hours ago. I was asleep, it was already the wee hours of tomorrow down here.
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Let's see you naked, then I can tell if it's the clothing, or ju... moreLet's see you naked, then I can tell if it's the clothing, or just you that makes you look fat.
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Your trunk? If your nose is that big, see a cosmetic surgeon. Un... moreYour trunk? If your nose is that big, see a cosmetic surgeon. Unless you're an elephant, then you need a vet.
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MAGA - My Attorney Got Arrested
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Call me a pedant, but those first two of yours are titled "Down ... moreCall me a pedant, but those first two of yours are titled "Down Under" and "Africa", respectively.(Smiles and gives you a Vegemite sandwich that has been rained on)Here's a few more ...
This post was edited by Slartibartfast at September 10, 2019 7:58 PM MDT
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