Active Now

Danilo_G
Discussion » Statements » Rosie's Corner » How does having money/not having it shape you? Specifically what am I talking about?
RosieG

How does having money/not having it shape you? Specifically what am I talking about?

Young ladies go to Finishing Schools or study abroad. They "come out" at Debutante Balls. They don't know the meaning of having to do without or worrying about tuition or future profession or education. Of course the recent scandals at elite schools where wealthy parents greased and eased the path their children took to be accepted is not the norm. Well perhaps it is and has been for many decades. SIGH. Moving on.....

Young gentlemen go to Prep School or study abroad. They don't "come out" as debutantes but they escort them and are very familiar with country clubs and tennis and golf and charities and traveling and socializing.

So here's the thing. If you were thrust into that milieu by being born into it whom would you be now having had a completely different list of experiences? Better or less good a person than you are?

Does knowing what it's like to want and not be able afford  something good for you?

Posted - June 21, 2019
Tags : None

Responses


  • 4624
    The tradition of making a debut died in 1958 when the Queen stopped receiving the daughters of aristocrats at the start of the summer season for balls.
    From then on, the custom gradually spread, filtered through various echelons of society - even though there was no Queen present to be introduced to.

    Now, most private schools and high schools have abandoned the custom,
    but charity workers arrange debutante balls for the intellectually disabled as exercises in social skills development.

    However, new forms of socially acceptable ways for the young elite to meet did quickly arise.
    Doing Marriage 101 at a top university is one.
    Others include skiing, fox hunting, sailing (real sails only) and so on. Yes, it's a club of cronies - a marriage market.

    I was born into that milieu (although there were odd differences at home) and went to the most expensive boarding school in the country.

    I found I didn't like most of the girls and their values (nor they, me) - except the rebels.

    I left the fold as soon as I left school, but I did keep an eye on what happened to the girls after they left school.

    Several are farmer's wives helping to run cattle and wool stations large enough to need a plane for supplies and a helicopter for round-ups.
    Quite a few went into big business - like highrise hotels for international conferences, electrical supplies, stock exchange futures - and rose to near the top, though none broke the glass ceiling.
    Several are politician's wives - one, Lucy Hughes, became the wife of our previous Prime Minister, Malcolm Turnbull.
    A few did well at university and went on to become successful professionals in law and medicine.
    One doctor uses her trust fund to enable her to treat the poor and homeless for free. She was the head girl - but is now out on a limb on her own.

    Most of these are involved in raising funds for charities - probably not so much from the heart as for social prestige.
    One joined the Red Cross and rose to a senior position.
    About 80% of these women sent their daughters back to the same school.

    The less smart ones tumbled - unable to get or keep good jobs, inheritances squandered, kids sent to high schools, no means to recover their former social advantages.

    Then there are the rebels.
    One became a concert pianist, organist and composer.
    Another works in ceramics, paper-clay and porcelain.
    A few became writers.
    One (whom I knew to be genuine because her father was senior in the UN,) joined the UN and works in refugee crisis centres.
    Her sister is a radio announcer and radical activist for Aboriginal self-determination.

    Rebels or not, divorced or not, successful or not:
    90% became alcoholics, a few became coke addicts.
    60% have become obese and have developed severe health problems.
    A few have died.


    This post was edited by inky at June 22, 2019 2:34 AM MDT
      June 22, 2019 1:40 AM MDT
    1

  • 113301
    Oh my goodness bw! Once again you have overwhelmed me with your thoughtful knowledgeable informative and first-person-having-experienced-it response. Once again I win the jackpot for my gamble! This is a  perfect example of a complicated and comprehensive response that ELEVATES a very simple ordinary question into something of value for which I thank you. I wonder whom I would be/would have been were I born to wealth? I'd like to think I'd use it to help others as some do and not spend my days flitting from one self-serving thing to another my entire life. But I cannot be sure of that. I think you turned out just swell! There is nothing in any of your prior postings that would indicate the slightest degree of snobbery. Thank you for sharing your personal experiences. The stats are so sad though. Alcoholism, drugs, obesity? What were they running away from? Why did they punish themselves? "Having it all" sometimes takes away self-esteem? I dunno. Do they punish themselves because they feel guilty for the lives they've led? Hard to tell. I'm out of touch with how the "rich and famous" live other than what I read from time to time. Thank you for bringing me up to date and exposing the reality of that life...warts and all! Happy Saturday my friend! :) This post was edited by RosieG at June 22, 2019 2:46 AM MDT
      June 22, 2019 2:45 AM MDT
    0