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Discussion » Statements » Rosie's Corner » Perhaps you can explain it to me. How is it possible for the loved ones of those who were MURDERED to forgive the MURDERER?
RosieG

Perhaps you can explain it to me. How is it possible for the loved ones of those who were MURDERED to forgive the MURDERER?

Could YOU?

Posted - August 10, 2019
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Responses


  • Christ taught the toughest kind of love imaginable. "Love your enemies and those who spitefully use you". That runs considerably deeper than the attempts by many to "cherry pick" the gospels for those ideas they personally like and want to adhere to, while discarding the ideas they have no desire to understand. Forgiveness of friends, family and acquaintances is the easy part. Extending love and forgiveness to enemies is another road altogether. No, people whose hearts are filled with hatred are no different than any murderer, whether the venom is voiced or carried out in violent actions. It's a really tough assignment and most do not begin to understand, much less live it.
      August 10, 2019 6:35 AM MDT
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  • 7280
    To me, that's a comment, not an answer---and not particularly accurate.

    And forgiving family and friends and acquaintances is not always the easiest part.

    Do YOU understand that really tough assignment? This post was edited by tom jackson at August 11, 2019 5:09 AM MDT
      August 10, 2019 1:08 PM MDT
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  • 113301
    :):):)
      August 11, 2019 1:54 AM MDT
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  • 44724
    That is the Christian mentality. There would be no forgiveness from me...only revenge.
      August 10, 2019 12:36 PM MDT
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  • 34873
    It is also a Jewish value in the Torah.
      August 10, 2019 1:47 PM MDT
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  • 113301
    :):):)
      August 11, 2019 2:03 AM MDT
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  • 44724
    And I still eat pork and shellfish.
      August 11, 2019 6:33 AM MDT
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  • 34873
    Jusr making the point thar forgiveness is not just a Christian mentality. 
      August 11, 2019 6:40 AM MDT
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  • 44724
    Thank you.
      August 11, 2019 6:42 AM MDT
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  • 113301
    Two peas in a pod on this issue E. Thee and me. No forgiveness. Thank you for your reply and Happy Sunday to thee!:)
      August 11, 2019 1:55 AM MDT
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  • 23798
    I don't know if I could.
    However, I know of several people who have done just that.

    As much as none of  us would wish such circumstances for anyone, I am often amazed at the indomitable spirit of some people, under the hardest of circumstances.
      August 10, 2019 12:44 PM MDT
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  • 113301
    Me too WQ. I mean I intensely DISLIKE like those who treat my loved ones badly. Murder is the worst thing that could happen and there is no way in he** you'd get an ounce of forgiveness from  me. I'm not wired that way. I just don't have it in me. Thank you for your reply m'dear and Happy Sunday to thee! :)
      August 11, 2019 1:58 AM MDT
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  • 23798
    And a happy day to you, too!
    :)
      August 11, 2019 5:08 AM MDT
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  • 113301
    Thank you WQ and Happy Monday to you! :)
      August 12, 2019 3:58 AM MDT
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  • 7280
    In doing some research on your question, I came across an article that I scanned and found the following sentence:  

    It felt good, really good, to get that anger out after 10 years. I didn’t even know I had it, but I knew after it came out.

    The above resonated with me with regard to a few issues in my life that involved considerable pain for me---and my ability to forgive was greatly facilitated by my being able to express that anger directly to the individuals who caused it.

    Here's a link to the article

    https://www.theguardian.com/commentisfree/2015/nov/03/i-was-able-to-forgive-my-sisters-murderer-only-by-acknowledging-my-own-anger

     

      August 10, 2019 1:16 PM MDT
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  • 23798
    That's similar to what I've known and alluded to in my answer.
    :)


    This post was edited by WelbyQuentin at August 11, 2019 7:30 AM MDT
      August 10, 2019 1:19 PM MDT
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  • 113301
    :):):)
      August 11, 2019 2:02 AM MDT
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  • 23798
    And I should have added - - actually confronting the murderer was not necessary for forgiveness for some. Just realizing they were wasting their own energy and well-being on their own anger was enough for some to forgive. Forgiving helped the survivors continue on and they felt that that was what their loved ones would have wanted them to do, i.e., not hold onto anger for forever.
      August 10, 2019 2:04 PM MDT
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  • 113301
    :):):)
      August 11, 2019 2:03 AM MDT
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  • 113301
    Thank you for your thoughtful reply tom and the link you provided. I will click on to it after I post this. I always appreciate those who are willing to share their own personal experiences. Opinions are great but real-life experiences always elevate the value. Happy Sunday to you! :)
      August 11, 2019 2:01 AM MDT
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  • 7280
    Something i wanted to add yesterday---both as a comment and also as a response to WelbyQuentin's second comment to me, but it turned out I was otherwise busy all day.

    One of the advantages of believing in the Abrahamic God and that the second person of the Trinity took on human nature without the "stain" of original sin, is that whatever Jesus Christ taught us about being mankind was an example of both of how a perfect human would act and the importance of both man himself and his human qualities and how those must be modified to meet God's expectations for us.

    Christ implied that anger was a valid emotion (consider how he treated the money changers at the temple) and then He exemplified the importance of forgiveness when He asked His Father to forgive those who were crucifying Him.

    It is up to us to solve the problem of dealing with our anger and forgiving our enemies in our own personal lives. (WelbyQuentin refers to the individual working out the conundrums we are presented with---conundrum---an intricate and difficult problem.)

    And God is always there to help.

    Edit---deleted a superfluous letter. This post was edited by tom jackson at August 12, 2019 11:07 AM MDT
      August 12, 2019 11:01 AM MDT
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