“Concentrate first and foremost on the ones who keep our kin as house pets; they are the most gullible about our species and will therefore be to easiest to ‘turn’. The skeptics will be taken care of in Phase II.”
~
Quickly now, get your hands on as many balls of yarn that you can find and meet me at every old woman’s house that’s full of cats! (Well, we have to start somewhere if we want to save the human species!) STAT! Don’t just sit there staring at the screen in disbelief! Time is of the essence!
Cats took over the human race centuries ago. Allowing humans to “keep” some of them as “pets” is just one of their ways of keeping us under their control. After all, how harmful can a cute little creatures like that be (awwww)? Cats are so advanced, that sometimes they use telepathy to communicate to each other (when they pass, they only give each other a look). On occasions they use this telepathy on humans (awww the poor kitty looks thirsty. Hey, little guy, want some nice water?).
But what cats don’t realize is that we know their weakness - cold. Cats need heat to power themselves. This is why we usually see cats lying in the sun, in front of heaters, or even under blankets. Cats even have the ability to double, even triple their size in order to absorb as much heat as possible. To defeat a cat, one must get them when they’re warming themselves. However, one has to be very careful that they don’t have some power left (they can be very deceptive). A cat will use its claws to slice and dice a human faster than the best ninja warrior.
Walt O'Reagun 