With global connectivity and 24-hour access, it‘s slowly beginning to happen here more and more at odd hours, including almost any time on Saturdays and Sundays.
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*Randy D at the Telemarketers’ Extra Special Yet Super Secret Annoyance Techniques Symposium:
“So let me see if I have this straight. You’re going to pay me all this money just to spy on some dude named Shuhak (frankly, it sounds made up to me), report back to you the best times to interrupt him on an average 24-hour period so that you can ring his phone or send texts at the most inopportune moments. Aha! That’s exactly what I thought you were up to. Well, let me tell you people something, let me tell you what I think of you and this low-handed, sneaky, undercutting and foul, foul plan of yours. Who do you think you’re dealing with, offering me all this money for a scheme like this? Don’t you know it’s far too much money to pay me for a job that I’d quite happily do for half the amount? Give me that contract and an ink pen, I’m ready to get started immediately. Grrrrrrr.”
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I think I can get them to stop doing this to you completely. Being the third cousin twice removed of a grandchild of the aunt of a brother-in-law of the mother of a late Nigerian prince, I have some clout in that world. Just send me all of your confidential access information for all banking and other financially-related interactions, and as soon as the $4500 personal check you send me clears, I’ll contact you from my chalet in the South of France to let you know how things are progressing in your case.
[By the way, don’t mention anything about this to Livvie; she’s much too busy with the children and I don’t want her to worry. You know how she gets.]
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Hey! Who told you to read that? It’s supposed to be a PRIVATE AND CONFIDENTIAL communication! How do you keep getting in here anyway? I have your pictures distributed to all of the security guards, they’re expected to keep you out! Grrrrr.
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Thank you.
Oh, by the way, what is the latest in the evening that a telemarketer has called your phone or sent a text message to it?
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