You think Jesus is impressed with the amount of apps on your phone?

Do you mean that hippy looking dude? I doubt it.

Meh ... Don't care, as long as Santa Claus and the Easter bunny  are cool with my apps. I kinda need my stocking stuffed and lots of  chocolate. 

Nope, and he isn't impressed by hipster beards either. 

Jesus is not a phoney.

I'd be kinda surprised. He might not use modern technology but some of his disciples do. 

The Pope called together his college of cardinals and announced that he had some good news and some bad news. "The good news is that the advent is imminent. Our Lord will return on Saturday afternoon, 5 o'clock, Mountain time." One of the cardinals said, "But with good news like that, how can there be any bad news?" And resignedly he said, "The email came in from Salt Lake City." 

I think Jesus wants you to learn to play the ocarina.

"I doubt it ... no cellphone."

I want to show him my app for turning water into wine,  see what he thinks of that.. then show him my app for bringing the dead back to life.

Personally I think he'd be please, maybe not impressed but I cannot think that if there is a God and Jesus they are going to get about anything that petty.. certainly wouldn't hold it against me.