Mom: No I didn't. Your father's new girlfriend sent me a text saying she wants me to die. Dad: I keep telling you she's not my girlfriend! She's your cousin and only suggested you dye the t-shirt I spilled spaghetti sauce on. Mom: No. I know what's really going on don't keep lying to me. And, she did say she wants me to die. Dad: Oh, for goodness sakes woman. I can't keep repeating myself. Mom: Son, are you coming over tonight for Sunday dinner. I am making a roast. Your father has invited his whore over too. Dad: Oh, for crying out loud. Stop it. Son: Not again! It's 2 a.m.! I told you I have to work tomorrow. Dad, take away Mom's phone.
This post was edited by Harry at May 29, 2017 1:52 PM MDT