Discussion»Questions»Family» Another father murders his child to "get back at" his wife. He hated her more than he loved his child. Others did the same. Monsters all?
It is something defned by Eckart Tolle which addresses the idea that when we are feeling emotional pain, it takes on a life of itself and takes over your mind and choices. That is if you are not aware, angry and just trying to get even.
So, men or women in this sick frame of mind, are apt to say things they don't mean to hurt someone back. That is very common. We all do it. Most of us, anyway. But when you let that anger pass any reasonable filters that most of us learn how to employ, you are either mentally ill or just completely stupid.
When you feel so angry that you have to do ANYTHING to get even? You are not thinking past the next second of what is going to happen to you. You just want everyone else to suffer.
Yes. Well tragically it is not unique. It is deplorable and horrible and never-ending and disgusting and heartbreaking and there is no cure. Thank you for your thoughtful reply.
Sounds like mental illness at its worst. My 25 year old daughter tried to commit suicide last month and i know it stems from a hatred of herself that also stems from a mental illness. Sometimes things are out of our hands and get out of control if not dealt with in time.
Thanks Shar to the Rona. Children dont come with a guarantee of health. She was born that way. These are the times my ADHD comes in handy. I dont dwell or have the capacity to concentrate on anything for very long, including the drama that comes with her particular mental disorder. I will always love her but have to practice tough love in order to stay safe from her insanity. My shrink agrees. He told me so today. lol
I'm really sorry cp that you have to experience that and also I hope once again this question hasn't caused you pain. You know that I ask all kinds of questions based on what I observe/learn/invent and there is no filter. Sometimes someone relates all too well and I regret that if it is hurtful. Is your daughter under a doctor's care? I cannot imagine hating myself although sometimes I'm not my favorite person. Understatement! But to have your darling child in such pain that suicide is an option is so sad. I hope that she finds a way out that is positive. Thank you for your reply m'dear. ((hugs))
This post was edited by RosieG at August 24, 2017 2:45 AM MDT
Yes, she just started seeing a shrink. Hopefully she will get into a new type of therapy that is suppose to help people that have this type of mental illness. I just hope she goes . Its up to her. Thanks for your kind words RosieG. ;)
I know there are meds that folks with Clinical Depression take that help balance them or help them to be stable. I had a friend who suffered from that and his doctor kept trying different combinations of things to see what would work best. I think sometimes you build up a tolerance to some meds and they are no longer effective. Thank you for your reply and you're welcome. We all want our children to live happy lives and when they don't or can't or aren't it can be so worrisome. :)
Some awesome answers here.. which I totally agree with.. I think there's a category that falls under, 'while the balance of his/her mind was disturbed.'b Perhaps that describes such actions... I really don't know.. I cannot even begin to imagine wanting to kill a child to get back at anyone... to me it just doesn't compare to things like slitting his tyres or her dresses.. I do wonder... such people cannot be *nice* to start with - can they? So perhaps they are monsters..?
These folks should NEVER be parents. I don't know if they are living on the edge from the beginning or something big they experience causes them to snap. It's just Russian Roulette for kids these days. They have no control over to whom they are born, where they live, how they live. It's a miracle how some of them survive horrible parents. Thank you for your reply Addb! :)
It's a LOT more common for women to commit that atrocity than for men to do so.
You obviously don't bother to research what you say but you might want to read a book titled The Murderer Next Door: Why the Mind Is Designed to Kill by David Buss. It has the numbers and takes a whack at explaining why that might be the case.
Reading comprehension problems, or are you just being a hypocrite?
I detest BS being spread anywhere other than on the garden or the farm so I did give a legitimate, academically-recognized reference on the subject. But it seems that when I see bovine excrement being presented as the truth and then point that out it offends the delicate "sensibilities" of many on this site for some reason. I should think that such an "enlightened" group of people would be sufficiently well read to actually be able to discuss a given subject intelligently, but apparently not in many cases.
Of course I didn't personally do any studies on the subject or run statistical analyses on any data collected by others. But I did give the title of a book that expounds on the subject of intentional homicide, a book written by someone that actually did collect the data and analyze it. And that scientist is David Buss, a respected sociological researcher and author. I had the opportunity to give that book a cover-to-cover" when one of my kids gave it to me after finishing up a particular unit in the study of Sociology at some little college in a Virginia town that's been in the news lately.
So as I said, you might want to give that particular tome a read if you're even slightly interested in the subject. I've already read it but I obviously can't share my understating of that work with you. That you'll have to do for yourself.
One swallow does not a swallow make.. and extending that using logic tells us that we must be wary of oversimplification or jumping to the wrong conclusions based on too limited research or limited understanding of same.
It would also tell us, what we should already know.. that A BOOK, however well written does not make it true.. AND let's face it.. some books are far from well written. I have laid this thought at your doorstep before.. you are clearly intelligent and read a lot of books..and I think you have especially read a fair few war books... all that's cool but you know we shouldn't simply believe everything we read in a book - almost all of them are written from a less than objective standpoint. We must also be careful of over-simplifying and thinking we know it all from one book, or several books all written from the same standpoint..
A jovial example.. the 50 shades books, very popular tho very badly written.. A goodly number of people have read them and believe they now know stuff about BDSM... They read about it in a book and so that must be how it is? Unfortunately the 50 shades books are heavily criticised by the BDSM community... they say that the books are NOT at all an accurate reflection of BDSM.. Just saying..
Didn't read the rest of the diatribe.. seemed like a load of hot air and attempts to belittle people again to me.. again unsurprising in terms of known Modus Operandi on your part.
Ahh but it's one thing to research but it's entirely another to understand it and reach a supportable claim.. SO in other words... our esteemed friend may well *research* but seems to still getting the wrong end of the stick .
And as usual your research is way off... It's also, as usual, way over-simplistic in it's approach, which leads to misinformation of the whole picture... For instance...you fail to consider abuse, which we KNOW is way more common among men than women. You fail to consider the fact that generally speaking the female has more contact and takes on the larger part of childrearing.. They are often the ones so it would make sense in cases such as post natal blues and other stresses that the woman would be more likely to harm the child than the father who generally spends much less time with his children and takes on less child rearing responsibility... But even then.. the stats don't seem to bear out what you claim... not EVEN in cases of jealousy and revenge.
I didn't conduct any research. I specifically stated that I didn't and referred to the work of a respected sociological researcher and author whom I actually do "reference". (Something that you apparently chose to ignore.) No links though because, well, IT'S AN ACTUAL BOOK, ink on paper. Do you not have libraries in England or are Brits just too lazy to read?
That researcher/author did aggregate all the raw, unbiased data he could compile on the subject. He just didn't rely on someone else's biased studies that you want to refer to. (How many "studies" did you have to look through before you found ones that seem to back your wrong-headed notions?) His work is used in at least two of the most respected universities in the US. (I say at least two because that's all I have personal knowledge of as that book and related information was shared with me by one of my progeny that happens to have a Soc (and other baccalaureate) degrees from the one and a MSPH from the other.)
But as I said, you obviously didn't bother to look at any of the actual data, just "researched" studies that back your pre-conceived imaginary notions; (The Huffington Post . . . PLEASE, tabloid journalism at it's finest.) I do seriously have to wonder how many other "studies" you had to pass over until you found the ones that backed you preconceive notions?
Nice try, but no cigar for you.
This post was edited by Salt and Red Pepper at August 24, 2017 2:57 PM MDT
2timothy 3:1,2 "but know this, that in the last days critical times hard to deal with will be here. For men will be lovers of themselves, lovers of money, boastful, haughty, blasphemers, DISOBEDIENT TO PARENTS, unthinkable, disloyal,"
WM BARR . =ABSOLUTE TRASH 