My friends and i have had fun times for many years.. only until not tool ong ago, I missed a couple hang outs, (but joined in others ) and they did not let it go.. making me feel low, and sad, and acting as if its a joke.. I thought to say something, but then thought, what might it truly do? They've done it twice now.. and when I left a social media convo that they were doing it in, they didn't ask why/care. I may think of slowly just distancing myself b/c if I say how low it made me feel they may just defend their snarky remarks as one of them did before. My question is, do I remove their feed from my own? I won't unfriend them b/c that is hard to do, but it is quite difficult for me to see their goings on/fun day , etc every other day.. what would you do ?
No I would not!
i would remove their feed from my view. don't unfriend... go neutral. forget about them. you'll be surprised how quickly you'll rebound. best wishes. =)
Oh please get rid of those losers.
I had that happen to me so many times on Answer Bag. I refused to talk to anyone on that PM thing. I did not want to interact anyplace except on the site. I don't care about gossip and nonsense and joining people's low-level ideas on what to think
I am here to tell you what I think. And if you don't like it? I don't lose a drop of sleep. If I am wrong, I apologize to that person. But there were people who claimed to be friends but their friendships were conditional. As in I was supposed to go on other sites and hang with them. No thanks.
They were boring enough on the site I was on. I certainly don't care what Jimmy said about Judy or who hates who this week. That kind of mindset is for those who don't have the courage to stand on their own two feet.
Ignore them and let the real quality people into your life. My friendship is not conditional. If I like you, I like YOU and do not worry about what Jimmy and Judy and shmotzie think.
Screw them. They are weak, confused, boring individuals who need a tribe of morons to back them up. If you don't agree with them, they feel attacked and you are an outsider. I consider being an outsider to that kind of nonsense a badge of honor.
I agree to not unfriend them right away since that will likely cause more drama. You may also find that they turn on you with you suddenly blocking and then find it frustrating to not being able to answer back to them talking in places where you will still see them. I would take them off your feed though and begin chatting it up with more positive minded people. At some point, you can then unfriend them.
As another point to consider, if you have friends like this, they will eventually turn on you. I have seen this more times than I can count. The old saying about making a friendship with a playground bully just because they are nice to you will never work out in the end if you have a moral code of your own. They do not like to be challenged.
=)
good stuff! yep..
Ty S... I feel like it IS a tribe, that purely enjoys talking about me, mocking me, and saying snarky things to me about if I didn't go once or twice... I mean why would a FRIEND do that? I have other friends, if oNe of us can't make it, it's no big deal. I am not certain if it is b/c they are males or not? (who are making the snaky comments).. but either way I feel small, and friends in my opinion don't do that. I would NEVER put them down.... so I guess I will just continue to not reply and maybe one day they'll get the hint it really kind of hurt me. Ty so much for the detailed reply and saying 'screw them'.. I don't 'want' to, but given how they continually do this, I want to say 'screw' that behavior.. have a great evening S
They are not really your friends if they behave like that.
Ty Pea pod.. I do agree unfriending is just too much. I'd always like to keep 'some' opening.. however I have no want to say' thx for hurting me so much w/your rude words..' b/c I feel WHY would they do this in the first place? Wouldn't a friend know, hmm, this may hurt them? It's like it didn't matter.. so I feel saying something just doesn't matter. Maybe it does, but I wil l give it time.. I might just not be on their feed anymore. I don't know how to do that lol, but will try to figure it out... I think they just think this is funny making fun of me and then being snarky, and baiting me.... but I'd never do that to them, ever. Ty so much for your response, you are very intuitive /kind ...have a nice one P
I feel sad about it... I know they wanted me to go but to bait me, be snarky etc.. ??? It made me feel low.... and I just don't have it in me to explain.. how could they not 'know' that would make someoen feel bad?? I just don't know whether to remove their name from my feed (not unfriend though)... on social media.. it is hard to see their name after the things they said to me.. (when we've been good friends for Years...:/ ) I don't know if underneath the 'guess I'll see you in 6 months or holidays...' comment , lies a negative feelign for one of my friends b/c I have not ever seen /visited his state (one state away) in the 15 yrs. I've known him (due to anxiety ..) but I've Always welcomed him here everytime he came, we laughed, had fun, exchaged gifts etc.. I've NEVER been rude to him, ever. So i dont' know if these snarky comments are due to that too, but I have felt low enough most of my life, to let this go on, doesn't seem 'friends'.. ty again Andy , ty for replying *huggg
I've been treated badly in real life by people who I thought were my friends, I was even physically assaulted by one of them even though I did nothing to him first. That was in 1997 and I still haven't forgiven him. That incident removed any possibilities of us remaining friends. I still won't have forgiven him if I'm still alive at 97. That's how it is with me. I make a staunch, loyal friend, but if anyone dares to betray my friendship then I make a relentlessly unforgiving enemy. People born on March 16th are like that - friends for life unless betrayed, then enemies for life.
It is entirely up to you whether you unfriend those people or not. If it happened to me I would certainly unfriend them, but that's my choice and it may not necessarily be the same as your way of dealing with it.
Carry on Answermugging!
That's not the description of what a friend is, so why keep calling them that?
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Your sleep comes in drops, Sharonna? Wait, that explains a whole lot about you . . .
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Wow I am so sorry that happened between you and your friend :( That is awful.. someone physically assaulting (in addition to emotional or verbal assault) is just unacceptable. I bet he is sorry but maybe his ego is too high to say it... and that's the thing..these ppl will not say I'm sorry even after I left a conversation online that they were being kind of snarky in.. so, I will not unfriend but I think removing from my feed might be my option :/ Ty again friend.. huggg
:( I know... it makes me sad, b/c I did nothing to them.. I just didn't attend a couple hang outs .. but always was kind and had fun with the next hang out... The only issue is, do u say something, or just let it go /move on?
What I have learned Baybreeze is that these people will make you question yourself many times before you finally see the problem really is with them. If they seem to always be in an argument with someone, trust me, that is a red flag you should never ignore.
You are very welcome. Have a god one yourself.
