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Discussion » Questions » Human Behavior » Generous/cheapskate isn't limited to money. Are you generous/stingy with yourself vis a vis how much of you is spent on others? Why?

Generous/cheapskate isn't limited to money. Are you generous/stingy with yourself vis a vis how much of you is spent on others? Why?

Posted - December 17, 2017

Responses


  • 16792
    I like to think I'm pretty generous with my time. I work two jobs and volunteer for the Red Cross as well as spending as much time as I can with my family, especially my little grandson. They're not babies for long.
    However, I have little patience with those who want to waste it.
      December 17, 2017 5:23 AM MST
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  • 113301
    Kudos to you for that. Thank you for your reply Sbf and Happy Sunday. FYI we are still mourning the loss of our beloved cat Tigger. We had to put him down July 25. He was part of our family for about 14 years. His organs were shutting down. He lost 1/3 of his weight. We will never recover from the loss. So your flippant anti-cat remarks hit a particularly sensitive spot that will never heal. You have no clue how hurtful that was. So knock it off. Save it for others. I don't welcome it. It was egregiously mean, cruel and ruined your reply. It was not clever or punny. It was mean-spirited.
      December 17, 2017 6:18 AM MST
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  • 16792
    Condolences for your loss. I've lost pets before and I know, they take a piece of your heart with them.

    My opinion on cats in general hasn't changed however. We have two in our household, my wife's and our daughter's. Both of them hate me unless it's dinnertime, the false affection at that time doesn't fool me - because as soon as they've eaten the situation reverts to cold war.
    There has only ever been one cat that I've had a rapport with - unique situation, Muffin thought she was a dog.
      December 17, 2017 6:27 PM MST
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  • 113301
    Thank you. Have you thought that perhaps YOU are the problem, not the cats? They KNOW you don't like them. If you KNOW someone doesn't like you who has control over you (you could kick them at any time and they know it) what would you do? Try to placate them by PRETENDING to tolerate them. How do I know this? I don't KNOW. But there must be some reason why they hate you and I'm guessing you give off strong hate vibes and they pick up on it. Try to love them. Try to find value in them. Pretend they are a favorite soccer team and root for them. I'm just sayin'. Thank you for your  reply Sbf and Happy Monday!  :)
      December 18, 2017 5:03 AM MST
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  • 16792
    I'm not keen on soccer either. Most soccer players are prima donnas, so are most cats.
    When Muffin was being my devoted and loyal "dog cat", we had another named Angel - who was a fallen one. That cat used to physically attack me, drew blood more than once. She would lie in wait around doorways or over them and wait for me to pass through, then pounce with her claws out. My antipathy towards cats probably started then.
      December 19, 2017 3:32 AM MST
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  • 113301
    That is definitely not normal Sbf. If you have an animal that attacks you for no reason there is something very wrong. Did you ever tell your vet about it? I would have gotten rid of the cat by taking it to a shelter that adopts pets out and doesn't put them down, explaining why you were making the move. You say "she would" which means she is no longer with you. All the cats I've ever had were very loving. Well as loving as   cat can be and maintain a certain distance/aloofness/independence. I'd pick Tigger up and hug him. He would tolerate it. But if I held him too long he would start wriggling so I'd put him down. When HE was in the mood he'd come over, get up on my lap and curl up for however long he felt like being there. Sometimes he'd fall asleep.  Sometimes he'd be gone quickly. He always shared himself fairly.  He'd get up on Jim's lap as often as mine. So if that were ever to happen again you shouldn't tolerate it. The cat isn't having a good time either you know. At least unless it is a devil cat. Thanks for filling in more detail. It always helps to get a backstory that explains why folks react to certain things in certain ways. I totally understand why you don't trust cats. That particular cat was an anomaly, not standard issue. :)
      December 19, 2017 6:46 AM MST
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  • 19937
    I'm more likely to spend money on others before I spend it on myself.  I'm pretty practical when it comes to owning material things, so I don't spend frivolously on myself. 
      December 17, 2017 6:02 AM MST
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  • 113301
    I'm not taling about money Spunky. How much of YOU do you give to others? How much of your time/interest/attention/views do you share? Are you generous or stingy? How of yourself are you willing to spend in the interests of or on behalf of others? Money is not needed. Sometimes it gets in the way. Another question cometh. Thank you for your reply! :)
      December 17, 2017 6:11 AM MST
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  • 19937
    I spend a good deal of time with my sisters and their families.  I try to be a good role model for my nieces and nephews and do things with them that they enjoy doing.  I head up various charitable campaigns in my office - Marine Toys for Tots, Salvation Army's Angel Tree, American Heart Association, City Harvest, etc.
      December 17, 2017 6:16 AM MST
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  • 113301
    ((hugs)) That is supercalifragilisticexpialidocious my friend. That is PRECISELY what I'm talking about!  Thank you for the additional comment! You make me VERY PROUD Spunky to be one of your  Answermug pals. I mean that sincerely! :)
      December 17, 2017 6:20 AM MST
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  • 19937
    Thank you, Rosie.  High praise indeed. :)
      December 17, 2017 5:11 PM MST
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  • 113301
    No Spunky. Well what I mean by "no" is that simply acknowledging what is while simultaneously bemoaning what isn't is all it is. I'm not sure if it's praise or just saying what is and how great it is!. If that's praise then I guess I'm guilty as charged. I think I've mentioned my friend who gives back all the time. I  just got an email from her this morning. She placed a few more abandoned pets in homes over the weekend at the shelter. I am so proud of her and how she apportions her time. I've told her so. Well I'm telling you so. Having a sense of duty maybe to give back/help out and actually do so is a remarkable trait in this day and age when we are surrounded by" I want, me me me,screw thee". You know what I mean. Thank you for your reply and Happy Monday! :)
      December 18, 2017 3:50 AM MST
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  • 19937
    I understand and I thank you. :)  Happy Monday. :)
      December 18, 2017 6:12 AM MST
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  • 113301
    :):):)
      December 18, 2017 7:20 AM MST
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