Why might Donald Trump turn himself into a Oscar Mayer wiener and what would he do if he was a Oscar Mayer wiener?

I think Trump might turn himself into  a Oscar Mayer wiener for 2 reasons - so everyone would be in love with  him and because he has invested in pork bellie stocks. So I think if Trump was a Oscar Mayer wiener he would  push Oscar Mayer wieners at all his rallies and press converances. I also think he would use his presidential powers to ban Canadian made Maple Leaf weiners from entering the US because he has sour grapes about Canada's Prime Minister not attending his recent trade talks with Mexico. Cheers!