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Randy D

(Tongue-in-cheek.) What did you do to cause the Grammar Cops to open an investigation on you?

 

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Posted - December 22, 2020
Tags : None

Responses


  • 10664
    First I was caught doing an exclamation mark in a question mark zone.  Then I was cited for double quoting without proper capitalization.  After that I was caught dangling my participle in public.  That got me labeled a homophone abuser.  Now everytime I use a conjunction my verb get tense.  It's so bad that I feel like I'm going to splice my comma.
      December 22, 2020 11:05 AM MST
    4

  • 53528

     

      (everytime every time)
      (verb)
      Or
      (gets)
      (I feel like as if)

    A repeat offender, folks.

      December 22, 2020 2:58 PM MST
    1

  • 10664
    Dang!  They're gonna send me to the school house for sure!
      December 22, 2020 5:39 PM MST
    2

  • 53528

     

      (gonna going to)

      December 22, 2020 6:50 PM MST
    1

  • 10664
    No, "gonna" is the right word.  Ya see, this here be me talkin', not me writing no essay.  (and yep, that there was one of them there double negligees)
      December 22, 2020 10:50 PM MST
    1

  • 10052
    Point out one of the cops' typos. Or, tell the cop that I've found a typo but not point it out precisely. That really gets them. 
      December 22, 2020 4:13 PM MST
    1

  • 53528

     

      That second one really drives me crazy. You know me too well. 


      I’m going to scour the law books for statutes prohibiting civilians from initiating unlawful familiarity with sworn officers. Be prepared to defend yourself against new charges.

    [We all know that when it comes to Officer Randall D Randall, unlawful familiarity is a one-way street.]

    ~

      December 22, 2020 6:50 PM MST
    1

  • 10052
    I'm not worried. Somehow I always seem to skate by without serious charges from the dynamic duo here. I think they're a little intimidated. Especially by my ability to retain my spelling, grammar and punctuation skills while under the influence of cannabis. 
      December 22, 2020 6:58 PM MST
    2

  • 53528

     

      Or maybe you’re just infatuated with one of them me.


    ~

      December 22, 2020 7:04 PM MST
    1

  • 10052
    Yeah, that's it. 
      December 22, 2020 7:08 PM MST
    1

  • 4624
    I failed a tricky question on elliptical sentence construction in a grammar test.

    (Now I duck for cover.)
      December 22, 2020 7:17 PM MST
    2

  • 53528

     

      Chief, this is Officer Randolph.  I’ll take care of this suspect’s case, if you don’t mind. Just leave her with me. 

    (Cough, cough.)

      ~

      December 22, 2020 7:22 PM MST
    0