comes up. This is possibly in the very first conversation you have with the person, or it may be later on down the line. Is there a particular number of children, if any, he or she already has that would be a deal-breaker for you? The person’s children, if any, can either be minors, adults, or combinations of minors and adults. This question is only concerning the number of children, with the understanding that the overall decision to date someone includes many, many other factors. See poll choices below.
a. Yes, five or more children are too many, I would not move forward.
b. No, even five or more children are fine with me, that would not be a deal-breaker.
c. Yes, four children are too many, I would not move forward.
d. No, four children are fine with me, that would not be a deal-breaker.
e. Yes, three children are too many, I would not move forward.
f. No, two children are fine with me, that would not be a deal-breaker.
g. Yes, two children are too many, I would not move forward.
h. No, one children is fine with me, that would not be a deal-breaker.
i. Yes, one child is too many, I would not move forward.
j. No, one child is fine with me, that would not be a deal-breaker.
k. Yes, he/she not having any children is too few, I would not move forward.
l. No, he/she not having any children already is fine with me, that would not be a deal-breaker.
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Why do you think it’s a trick question?
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The premise is that as the two are in the process of getting to know each other, especially if it’s at the stage of considering a more serious level of relationship, it’s the type of information that would most likely come up on their conversations. I did not mean that either party would attempt telepathy or mindreading in order to guess about children.
(Why are you the only one so far who read the post that way?)
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Randall to the therapist: “I’m torn, I really am torn. On one hand, Ansley is so intelligent, sharp, eclectic, articulate, enthralling, with it, cool, witty, fun, funny, down-to-earth, unpretentious, real, charming, interesting, alluring, warm, friendly, . . . ”
Therapist: “Why did you stop? I’m listening, please go on.”
Randall: “ . . . well, on the other hand, she’s just so kooky! She’s so much like me that it’s downright eerie! Even if I tried to, I just can’t resist this woman! Arrrggghhh!”
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“How many children are we talking about? ”
Er, um, isn’t that exactly what you’re being asked to ascertain in answering the question???
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Lol!
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That does not even begin to get close to resembling anything near to an answer to the question as is was asked.
I don’t dispute that the myriad of things that do and might happen to minor children (and in reality can happen to any person at any time in his or her life regardless of age) are the types of things that one takes into consideration, but the reason I put:
That does not even begin to get close to resembling anything near to an answer to the question as is was asked.
is that I had already anticipated ancillary points might be raised, as evidenced by what I included in the description field:
This question is only concerning the number of children, with the understanding that the overall decision to date someone includes many, many other factors.
As such, I sought a balance between assumptions that the importance of other issues surrounding the overall issue would be diminished if left unaddressed, and branching out on zillions of tangents that would detract from the poll. There is absolutely no way that all of the pertinent elements of concern when a relationship begins could be covered in one string of Q&A, so I wanted to keep a focus aimed in a single direction. By bringing up his points, Stemmata went far into left field. While his points are true, he didn’t tie them to any answer that has to do with the question. It’s almost as saying a shirt that one plans to wear at a date costs about the same as the entrees.
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Who said anything about hiding children, or even hiding any information at all?
who said anything about limiting the number of children anyone has? The post is about how many children the other person already has, and how many children you are comfortable with or not comfortable with if you were to continue into a more serious step in the relationship. It’s not about an ideal number of children.
Seriously, I think if you were EVER to A) read a question just the way it’s written, B) understand what you have just read, and then C) post an answer that actually follows the conversation, I would probably clutch my heart as cardiac arrest takes me over in complete shock. It’s really a shame, too, because with your high level of intelligence, none of this tangent-running makes sense.
In short, you have obviously failed to capture the gist of this discussion.