sonate him before either informing everyone else of his death, and/or deleting his account?
a. One day
b. One week
c. One month
d. One year
e. One decade
f. Not at all; I could never put up with all that hatred and abuse being heaped upon me, and I’m not going to spend all my free time memorizing those grammar textbooks anyway
g. Not at all; there’s no way I could afford the maintenance expenditures on a Harem
h. Not at all; you haven’t seen how messy those Tilde Vaults are
i. Not at all; the minimum prison sentence for being a co-conspirator in that basement dungeon scheme is the same as that of the principal perpetrator
j. I love avocados and guacamole; I could start a whole new movement
k. The Australian government has already contracted me to begin shipments of Vegemite to Honolulu, Seattle, Los Angeles, Denver, Chicago, Juneau, New Orleans, Miami, Nashville, Indianapolis, Boston, Philadelphia, New York City, and Bangor
l. I just want to know who’s could to clean up all those restraining order letters
m. Two or more of the above
n. None of the above/other answer
~
Grrrrr, danged Aussie! I’m going to petition the Office of Haunting Authorization as soon as Saint Peter has cleared me to receive my wings and halo . . . wait, what’s that you say? There‘s not even a Saint Peter where I’m going? But I was assured that the whole Minnesota stalking charges had been expunged! That sub-basement already existed under my house when I moved in, I just stumbled upon it accidentally after a flood! I always believed those women wanted to stay down there making sandwiches! I swear that I hardly ever looked at the footage from the hidden cameras I installed in Livvie’s bathrooms! You can’t do this to me, I’ve got hundreds of thousands set aside from offshore tilde accounts, we can make a deal, just name your price! I don’t look good in red, and brimstone makes my hair all frizzy! Why aren’t you listening? We can cut a deal right now! Hey, don’t even open that Tilde Vault; my body’s not even cold yet! How did you get here so quickly from Australia anyway? Hold on, is that mayonnaise and avocados you’re stocking in my pantry? There ought to be a law! Grrrrrrrr.
~
Thank you, Young Lady, but perhaps you didn’t hear about my condition . . . I’m probably closer to the end than you think.
~
Not thick, thin, but also old, decrepit, frail, and failing.
~
Well, there is that.
~
The fact that I frequently run long distances (and other excercise-related activities that I do); in spite of or opposed to the claim that I don’t have long to live.
~
Thank you, Young Lady, but perhaps you didn’t hear about my condition . . . I’m probably closer to the end than you think.
Not thick, thin, but also old, decrepit, frail, and failing.
~
Oops.
~
Zack 