Those of you who drink martinis, do you ever say, “Shaken, not stirred” when ordering it?

If so, how many times has the bartender given the nod to the bouncers, upon which you were grabbed roughly, severely beaten, thrown out of the place’s back door into the garbage-strewn alley, and warned never to return lest it be much worse the next time? (Grrrrrrr.)

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