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Discussion » Questions » Human Behavior » Was I in the wrong?
Benedict Arnold

Was I in the wrong?

Yesternight a friend and I shared a pizza.  There was one slice left on the plate, I took it.  My friend was miffed and thought I should have offered the final slice to him.  So I asked him, "Were you going to offer it to me?"  He replied he was.  Had he done so, I would have accepted it and the situation would be exactly what it was. 

Posted - March 20, 2017
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Responses


  • 7280
    Not exactly wrong, but perhaps not the optimal way of handling such a situation.

    There are social "niceties" that can guide such situations and prevent hurt feelings---and that's why they exist.

    The general rule is to offer it to him.  Then he has two choices---graciously tell you to "Go ahead and finish it" or suggest that you and he split it. 

    Either way, you have given him a choice he can effectively deal with as opposed to making that choice for him.  (Namely---You are not going to be allowed to eat that last slice of pizza.)
      March 20, 2017 11:16 AM MDT
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  • This is thoughtful.  Still my friend got the outcome that would have been had he offered.  Moreover he is my friend and should look towards my happiness and be happy with my happiness, which in this case was the final slice.
      March 20, 2017 11:19 AM MDT
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  • 7280
    Yes.

    My only comment is "It is dangerous to anticipate another person's way of thinking."

    I think even God likes to be asked His opinion before we assume what it will be.
      March 20, 2017 11:21 AM MDT
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  • 6124
    LOL!  Sounds like you already had the answer to your own question all along. ;-)


    This post was edited by Harry at March 20, 2017 11:50 AM MDT
      March 20, 2017 11:22 AM MDT
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  • Yes.  I suppose the question is more of a survey of others opinions on the situation or how other would have acted.  Or maybe the question is just fatuous.  
      March 20, 2017 11:28 AM MDT
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  • 3191
    Either way, I offer to split it with them.  
      March 20, 2017 11:20 AM MDT
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  • Leaves two people only partly satisfied. 
      March 20, 2017 11:28 AM MDT
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  • 3191
    Not necessarily.  As to your handling of it - taking the last piece either way, it leaves your friend miffed...and as Harry stated, slices of pizza are easier to come by than friends.  
      March 20, 2017 11:40 AM MDT
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  • I have received good responses. Perhaps the best solution is to order a bigger pie.
      March 20, 2017 11:42 AM MDT
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  • 3191
    That doesn't necessarily negate the same situation arising.
      March 20, 2017 11:44 AM MDT
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  • At the onset yes. But eventually we'll find a pie that provides slices enough to satisfy us both.  Then of course we'll have to wonder what to do with the left overs.  How did a friendly social evening become so complicated?! 
      March 20, 2017 11:47 AM MDT
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  • 3191
    "Eventually" will only apply if your friendship survives.  Lol
      March 20, 2017 11:52 AM MDT
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  • Of course it will survive.  Everyone one wants to be friends with me.  Few are granted the honor.  Who would not willing give up a slice of pizza to secure that friendship?
      March 20, 2017 3:07 PM MDT
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  • 3191
    Me.
      March 20, 2017 3:11 PM MDT
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  • Here, you may have the last slice...
      March 20, 2017 3:13 PM MDT
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  • 6124
    Pizza pies always have an even number of slices.  So, the question is best answered when we know how many slices each of you had eaten prior to that last slice.  Who had eaten the lesser number?  Whoever did, deserved the last slice.  So, if he ate more slices than you, it was your slice to eat.  You wouldn't be obligated to ask him if he wanted it.  If it was the other way around, then it was his slice and, therefore, you were under the obligation to ask him if he wanted it prior to making the decision you did to just take it.

    All that being said, good friendships aren't easy to find.  Pizza slices are. This post was edited by Harry at March 20, 2017 11:50 AM MDT
      March 20, 2017 11:27 AM MDT
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  • Ah! Well said.  Yes, one of us acted disingenuously, either by intention or inadvertently. And it has occurred to me I may have acted rightly and even lovingly to my friend.  I took on the health risks of the fats and calories of that final slice. 
      March 20, 2017 11:34 AM MDT
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  • 2960
    Next time, you should each buy a pizza of your own and there will be no question to the ownership of the pizzas. If there is any pizza left over, the expectation would be that the person would want their own pizza to take home for later. If you do offer the leftover pizza, then it will actually be extremely generous since the pizza never belonged to the other person in a communal sense.
      March 20, 2017 12:13 PM MDT
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  • Capitalism and socialism mix!  But what if one of us choose poorly in his pizza order and now finds the other's pizza to be more desirable?  Should their be negotiations or should one engage in some annexation?
      March 20, 2017 3:10 PM MDT
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  • 2960
    Definitely annex that pizza.
      March 20, 2017 6:46 PM MDT
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  • Provide a plausible covering reason and we'll share the bounty.
      March 20, 2017 7:20 PM MDT
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  • 14
    The point would be in having the good manners to offer it first whether you end up getting it in all scenarios or not.    I realize you children are no longer taught social manners but its better to offer than be the pig and hurt the friendship.   Clearly your friend expected better manners.  
      March 21, 2017 4:51 AM MDT
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  • 6124
    Children?  Ask Whistle's age.  lol.
      March 21, 2017 5:28 AM MDT
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