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Randy D

If I were to invent a grammar machine, what should be some of its functions?

  • Engineer Randy D
Companion question to:

https://answermug.com/forums/topic/26757/if-you-were-to-invent-an-anti-grammar-machine-what-would-some-o/view/post_id/235372
~

Posted - March 31, 2017
Tags : None

Responses


  • 53509

    Lol!

    :)
      March 31, 2017 6:47 PM MDT
    2

  • 1002
    Function #1:
    Ensure that no one over the age of 13 ever strings the words "would of," "should of" or "could of" together ever again. That is truly painful to behold.
      March 31, 2017 6:35 PM MDT
    6

  • As well as WW's buzz it should cuckoo, just for the dummies: 

      March 31, 2017 6:39 PM MDT
    7

  • Considering the number of typos I allow to slip through I can guarantee that all by myself. :)
      March 31, 2017 6:50 PM MDT
    5

  • How about a douche bag?
      March 31, 2017 6:46 PM MDT
    5

  • I thought so. It may get a lot of use around here :)
      March 31, 2017 7:05 PM MDT
    4

  • It kind of looks like that. Not all at the same time obviously
      March 31, 2017 7:26 PM MDT
    1

  • 14
    My late mother's best friend had a favorite saying: never leave home without your toothbrush and your douchebag.
      March 31, 2017 7:21 PM MDT
    3

  • Hah! Now that's funny!
      March 31, 2017 7:26 PM MDT
    3

  • Gob clapping pedantic grammar cops.
      March 31, 2017 6:48 PM MDT
    4

  • 14
    Early morning standing ovations to get us off to a good start for the day.
    https://www.google.com/search?q=gif+applause&espv=2&source=lnms&tbm=isch&sa=X&ved=0ahUKEwi0pc3VhoLTAhVL6IMKHcbvCewQ_AUIBigB&biw=1440&bih=770#imgrc=QruhZbCAs1vhBM:
      March 31, 2017 6:58 PM MDT
    4

  • It's shuld bee alerts four missspelings. iT's shuld allsew no whne the grammur is'nt rite. mybee its culd beep whens things our messes up. punchuashuns shuld, bee watched? two,
    iF it's gots lites and, beeps too allerted you! iT shuld bee gud too go/ 
      March 31, 2017 7:06 PM MDT
    9

  • 53509



    You again!  Grrrrrrrrrr.

    ~ 
      March 31, 2017 11:05 PM MDT
    4

  • Whut? I no you luvs me.  yOu asket mine opinyun and i giveded it too you?
      March 31, 2017 11:08 PM MDT
    1

  • 53509

    Paramedic #1: Ok, he's stable now, so let's get him to the Trauma Unit asap!


    Paramedic #2: You guys talked with his family members, right?  What did they say happened to him?


    Paramedic #3: It's strange; he was just surfing some mediocre Q&A website and puff, his heart went out.


    Paramedic #4:  He's young, he's healthy, in great physical shape, no family history of heart problems.


    Paramedic #1: Maybe it was something he read.

    ~


      March 31, 2017 11:45 PM MDT
    1

  • Doctor #1: We have another unexplained trauma in room 36B. We need to get the team together and find out what happened.

    Doctor #2: I have already done a preliminary exam on the patient. Everything seems to be in working order, except for the strange sounds coming from his intestines. I have sent him to x-ray, the results should be back momentarily. 

    Doctor #3:  I have the x-rays, looks like there is some sort of bowel blockage. We should prep him for surgery.

    Doctor #1: Oh My God! He was full of tilde eggs! 

    Image result for crazy x-rays

    Doctor #3: That explains a lot. I checked out that website he was on when his attack commenced, that sweet lady he was talking to had nothing to do with this. I messaged her on the site and she is upset that anyone thought she could have had anything to do with this. Its odd though, she said something about the clowns didn't do it, they were late getting there. Any idea what she could have been talking about?
      April 1, 2017 7:27 AM MDT
    1

  • 53509


    Sure sounds like a cover-story to me!  Nice try to wiggle your way out of a lawsuit, lady!  "Innocent sweet little old lady", yeah, right!  You're a grammterrororist!  I want you to pay my hospital bills, AND I'm planing to go after you for punitive damages too!  See you in court!  Grrrrrrrr!


    P.S.  The tilde eggs were coming along nicely, now you've ruined them!  Double grrrrrrrrrr!

    ~
      April 1, 2017 7:39 AM MDT
    1

  • 53509
    *(planning)
      April 1, 2017 7:41 AM MDT
    1

  • Sue me, huh? OK, OK...My lawyer is on his way over to work out all the details. I must tell you, he's a killer in the courtroom.....
    Image result for evil clown
      April 1, 2017 7:46 AM MDT
    0

  • 5451
    It should make blending words and creating portmanteaus easy and effortless!




      March 31, 2017 7:42 PM MDT
    7

  • Oh  I really love this one, Livvie...them fancy portmanteau words an' such...!
      March 31, 2017 9:29 PM MDT
    3

  • A silent mode.
      March 31, 2017 7:43 PM MDT
    6

  • 7683
    One that produces TILDES.....~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~all grammar mistakes will be Randied and tilded;)) This post was edited by Veena.K at March 31, 2017 11:31 PM MDT
      March 31, 2017 7:49 PM MDT
    4

  • OFF SWITCH 
      March 31, 2017 8:32 PM MDT
    6