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Discussion » Questions » Life and Society » To those who have attended one... so what really happens at a Prom? Is it really like the American movies?
Adaydreambeliever

To those who have attended one... so what really happens at a Prom? Is it really like the American movies?

My daughter wasn't going to go to hers... I didn't want her to go either... she's been bullied non stop for 5 years so it's not like she enjoyed her time there .. she didn't complete the last few months.... and i guess too, I just don't see the point of this Prom stuff....but anyway she has decided to go... loads of expense for the dress, the shoes and a special hairstyle... grrr

American movies show Proms as pretty scary to be honest.. bitchy girls all trying to out-compete each other in terms of fancy dress and glamour... boys erm seemingly looking to get laid... and always some geeky/unpopular kid being picked on and ending up in tears because of some cruel practical joke...

So tell me.. it's not really like that is it?

Posted - June 18, 2017
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Responses


  • 7939
    Prom is what you make of it. I went to my senior prom and I went to Military Ball because I was in ROTC in high school. Military Ball is just like prom, but for those in ROTC. (ROTC- Reserve Officer Training Corps- a military education class.)

    I wasn't one of the "cool" kids and I didn't have a lot of money. Yes, there were girls who spent hundreds on dresses and got their hair and makeup professionally done. Many went out for expensive dinners and chipped in on a limo. I did not. For both events, I had a dress from Ross- a discount store that sells department store cast-offs. As I recall, both dresses were around $20-40. I didn't go out to dinner before either and my date had a vehicle for each one, so he drove. My high school was so big that I didn't even know the people crowned king and queen of the prom, but I did know the ones crowned at Mil Ball, simply because it was a much smaller group. I suppose I was more of the "in-group" at that one, but in any case, I don't remember anyone being left out or picked on at either event. I didn't socialize at prom, but I did at Mil Ball. My best friend was an only child and her parents had money. She was gorgeous and dressed to the 9's. I don't think either of our experiences was much different. I really can't say about people hoping to get laid. I suspect it was no different than any other day. I really don't remember it being a big time for people to lose their virginity. The people itching to lose it had done so already and the people planning to hold onto it did.
      June 18, 2017 2:59 PM MDT
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  • 6477
    Cool.. I am sure she will be ok.. she says she will hang out with her TA - teaching assistant.. they have been together for 5 years and have a very roller coaster relationship... the TA is often mean to her but at the same time is the only one my daughter can turn to much of the time, knowing she will try to help.. If that happens it's kinda a nice way to end their relationship... my daughter, who, because of her special needs, is very demanding... must have taken up so much of this TA's time and energy that I have no doubt the TA will be a bit lost without having to spend so much time trying to resolve problems for my daughter!

    I guess for me I don't really get the whole prom thing.. it's definitely NOT a tradition we in the UK have.. it's an import and relatively recent.. We never had proms when I was at school...and personally I think we, and certainly our parents, were the better for that.. 

    Daughter's dress will be very inexpensive but nice, the shoes, which I really don't like were £29, which was way too much imo and the hair will be £40 = no make up. .. so relatively inexpensive compared to some..but given the choice, I'd ban proms lol
      June 18, 2017 3:07 PM MDT
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  • 7939
    Hopefully your daughter has other friends to spend time with. I suspect she'll get very bored and lonely if there aren't other singles to dance and mingle with, but that's all. I'm sure she'll be fine, but it'll probably be an early night unless she has friends around. It's kind of a rite of passage, and if she feels like she needs to go, she'll regret it if she doesn't, but odds are, it'll be a non-event, though she'll no doubt have fond memories of getting dolled up and being a princess for one night.
      June 18, 2017 3:22 PM MDT
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  • 6477
    Wellll long story.. her friends were shall we say not very good friends, they were part of the problem much of the time... and she sorta dropped out the last 2 months of school, partly because of her useless friends..  I think, but could be wrong, that there is way less emphasis on *dating* re  our proms than perhaps is the case with American proms..she will still only be 15... SHe seems happy to hang out with the TA... and if anything that's who she is closest to re the school.. they have been through much together.... sometimes hating each other but as I say the TA was really the only one daughter felt she could talk to there... and in her own way the TA tried to help...

    We never had this rite of passage when i was at school... lol personally I am glad of that, but I think now that we do seem to have it here, the kids are just as excited about it as their American counterparts. For daughter she is most excited about her hair being done - she has lovely long thick hair which will be curled and plaited :)
      June 18, 2017 3:29 PM MDT
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  • 7126
    Didn't go because I was the school neak. That's a combination of nerd and freak.   This post was edited by LyricalOne at June 18, 2017 3:08 PM MDT
      June 18, 2017 3:05 PM MDT
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  • 6477
    Nerds and freaks rule :)  we never had such things when I was at school...and honestly I am glad of that!  
      June 18, 2017 3:09 PM MDT
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  • 7126
    My niece, on the other hand, is absolutely THRILLED to be going to prom. It's been months of prepratory activity, lots of excitement, and is finally happening on Thursday. 

    So so while it would be easy for me to be dismissive because of my experience, that's certainly not the case for everyone.   
      June 18, 2017 3:17 PM MDT
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  • 6477
    Yes, I am sure you are right.. some people love it.  I do wonder tho... if you did a survey, how many people would say they love it and how many would say it isn't somethng they are interested in. 
      June 18, 2017 3:30 PM MDT
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  • 7126
    What made it hard for me is that I felt very left out. But these days it's not unusual for kids to go solo or in groups.  So it's far more likely to be a fun social event for everyone.   
      June 18, 2017 3:36 PM MDT
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  • 34239
    Never went to prom.... skipped it and went straight to the party. 
      June 18, 2017 9:17 PM MDT
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  • 22891
    i never went to mine, my sister was in the hospital at the time with a nervous breakdown and i guess i totally forgot the prom, no guys asked me anyways so i never bothered going
      June 19, 2017 2:58 PM MDT
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