What was the faith or philosophy of your parents?

I really like your answer because of its honesty, openness, and realism. The world would probably be a better place if many people took a similar view.

I've also suffered a lot of self-hatred in my life (depression), and it's been a hard journey to recover.

Hope you don't mind me offering the following tidbits, just for the record ...

The two Golden Rules...

The first, taught by Moses, was, "Do unto others as you would have done unto you."

The problem with this one is that although most of us have pretty much the same basic needs, many of us have entirely different wants and tastes, and almost none of us are good mind readers - so it works better to find out first what others really want before doing unto them.

The second, taught by Jesus, was, "Love others as thyself."

It's a subtle but innovative improvement - and yet as I said above, many people do not love themselves and have no idea know what love really is. So it kind of gets stymied before it ever gets started.

Thank you for that.  :)

What I find so beautiful about the Golden Rule is that it's basic reciprocity appears (in one form of another) in almost every religion, philosophy and tradition in human history.  No matter where you look it pops up as a direct instruction.

I have to say I'm not a fan of complicating rules, and I think that is what is at the base of the main objection you mention.  I've heard it from such luminaries as Kant, Nietzsche and George Bernard Shaw.  It has some merit, but only if one follows the 'active' version of the Golden Rule rather than the passive one.  

To me, this kind of 'active' could indeed enable imposition, coercion and a few other unpleasant possibilities, but it seems inherently blind and deaf to the world around us.  In being this way it overlooks the important and wonderfully simple fact that the Golden Rule is, I believe, self-correcting.

But it's a lovely thing, whichever way you look at it.  Even if all the objections to it were entirely correct, I think on balance it would achieve more good than harm if more widely practised.  :)  

I enjoyed your reasoning. :)

I think you're very likely right that such a rule may tend to be self-balancing.

It's an interesting thought that hadn't occurred to me.

It appeals because there's something inherently natural about it - as though it flows with the physical law of cause and effect.

Did they explain or demonstrate their idea of what is good?

I take it that you accepted and try to live it as best you can...

Dad's: Work hard, eat plenty, play outside, learn from your mistakes. 

Mom's: Be a(n admitted) nutcase.  

Grandparents: Work hard, and like working hard, 'cause working hard is important, and it is good to work hard and to enjoy life, and you must work hard to enjoy life. Or something like that. 

None have changed. 

1- What was the faith or philosophy of your parents?

Islam

2- Is your view the same, slightly or much changed?

Same, Islam, but much changed

And,

3- whichever variation it is, why?

Several reasons including slightly higher education in sciences and religion, vastly more intensive exposure to proactively proselytising religions and a more critical approach to everything.

السلام عليكم

I am not Muslim, nor likely to become one,

but I am very interested in peace and understanding between people of differing faiths.

It would be beneficial for everyone here to know how modern Islam can be.

Would you share with us the specific differences it makes to embrace Islam

in the midst of science and higher education?

My dad?  Family first

My mom? Same

I had good role models

Is "family first" a denomination of Christians?

Or were they simply people with no particular faith

but who prioritised caring for family ahead of all else?

I can imagine, (barring the possibility of the errors most of us make,)

that that would make for a solid foundation of something good in your inner being.

Have your beliefs or values shifted away from theirs in any way?

If so, how?

TY HF, Do let me know if the following doesn't fully answer your questions:

1- There is no barrier of insurmountable conflict between reason and Islam.

2- God serves the purpose of being the primordial source of the universe and its laws and as a potential unifying focal point for humanity.

3- If God is the creator and cared for the guidance of his creation then He would have sent His guidance to all of humanity that ever existed and not to just one region of the world. The Muslim scripture, the Holy Qur'an [HQ] acknowledges that there were scriptures and other forms of God's guidance sent to all peoples before the HQ.

4- The HQ criticises blind following, urging believers to contemplate, question, investigate and verify. These exhortations led the early Muslims to push the frontiers of human knowledge for about eight centuries [that's more than half the fourteen centuries since the revelation of the HQ] and to develop methods of investigation that we call science today. They left a legacy from which we continue to benefit to this day, including the zero and the decimal Arabic numerals which we quickly adopted to replace our cumbersome Roman numerals and which together totally revolutionised mathematics.

My mom was Pagan but she died and my dad is VERY evangelical. Me and him don't get along so well because (not the sole reason though) of it and while he's not a bad human being just very absent. He found my step mom and suddenly found God.

As for the rest of my family on my mom's side they are very accepting and religiously diverse... very widely diverse in fact. Very tolerant and kind people. Some are atheist, some are Jewish, most are Christian... some are Catholic. Just diverse really.

My views have changed a lot. I am still finding myself at this point and have no idea what my views are but I have a wide range of views. On one hand I know the theory of evolution and accept it. I also know many scientific explanations about the human mind such as that it can lie and distort what we want to see sometimes... it can even hallucinate and tell you things are there when they are not really. The mind is a wonderful but powerfully deceptive mechanism that will go to great lengths to protect you even if it's harming you.

On the other though I am agnostic at the present moment but I have a polytheist knowledge due to my own exploration. I am more of a metaphorical person. Many old school occult views (not the new age occult but old stuff) was ripe with a whole bunch of common wisdom if one examines it purely from a metaphorical standpoint.