*shrugs* It's funny because I gave a "sweet" answer on the woman question with no hesitation- love is given freely and unconditionally. But men, they do love differently, don't they? Or, maybe I just haven't known one who loved in the same way I did. I still don't think it's earned (although food always helps lol). Perhaps it grows instead, like a weed between the sidewalk slabs. Some revel in the beauty of the bloom, but it often gets snuffed out because it's "out of place," stomped on by unaware travelers, or poisoned.
Love of course is ultimately an act---something we do---preferably all the time and to the best of our ability. Feelings come an go (You may remember that I have said that "real intimacy is rarely polite."
That brain chemistry storm which frequently accompanies "infatuation" is determined greatly by our previous environment. After that (or in spite of that) we sometimes come (by choice or unfolding) to love that person and act accordingly---sometimes for ever.
Just Asking 