Yes, I support her statements because she's right. It doesn't mean any of us are insensitive to your problems. However, it does mean YOU are being insensitive to others. You are refusing to simply show empathy or compassion for another person on here without attempting to make it into something that relates to your own issues. When it was pointed out to you, you felt the need to defend your position, instead of realizing that you were not showing respect toward Carbon's situation. Lyrical's frustration with you built as your frustration toward her built. You need to stop this nonsense. Your feelings are hurt? You're a grown a$$ed man for goodness sake. Start listening to what other people are saying and stop with the pity party already. You are stuck in a rut of your own making TS. Instead of complaining about how "she done you wrong", what you didn't see, etc., start finding a way to move forward with your life. As I stated, we've all been giving you support, and advice, for weeks. You acknowledge it but what are you doing about it? Sitting here complaining and playing the victim as you are doing, isn't constructive behavior.
I think you're overreacting and I don't know how you can be so sure that you're right all the time? Life is more complicated than you think Harry. Good luck to you. : )
Thanks for answering the question. If you don't mind I'd like to ask you more about your response.
When you say that you left with someone else do you mean that you met someone while you were still in a relationship and you left your spouse for someone else?
When you say you didn't cheat is that just referring to sex or did you consciously end your first relationship before beginning another? Thank you.
Yeah I remember doing that too, wondering about how it would feel to be free and once the relationship is over I started fantasizing about being back with my partner again.
Do you feel like you've lost the connection between you and your partner Zack? How long have you been together if you don't mind me asking?
This post was edited by Benedict Arnold at September 25, 2017 3:16 PM MDT
As a married man, no. When I was single, I had sufficiently satisfied my curiosity. The act itself is less than complicated. The requirements for a good sexual experience are that at least for the moment, hearts, minds, and bodies reach out toward one another.
On a long time basis, that is much easier to achieve in a good marriage. (At least I have found it so.)
A lot of women and a lot of men think that infidelity is a deal breaker in any relationship. It can be devastating, but it is not fatal unless you deem it to be so.
Almost every issue in a relationship is an opportunity for growth.
Hmm...interesting. Maybe because you sowed your wild oats you didn't have so many unanswered questions as a married man? I was only with a few partners before I got into a very long relationship that lasted throughout my 20's and most of my 30's. Maybe that's part if why the mind wanders? Were you able to continue a relationship with a woman who was unfaithful and how was it, how did it affect you? If you don't mind me asking?
This post was edited by Benedict Arnold at September 25, 2017 4:35 PM MDT
Never did like that phrase "sowing wild oats." It implies randomness. Just doesn't fit me. I was in the single digits myself with regard to relationships---and I was married before to a woman who just wanted to get out of the house and then decided when it was time to get off the birth control pills without telling me---and right after her doctor told her DO NOT get pregnant within the next 4 months. She was a very selfish woman who cared only for herself.
She divorced me when I was 27 and we had just bought and furnished a new house. I remarried when I was 37 to my wife of (about to be 36 years) this October.
(I used to joke that my first wife had a statue erected to her by a large group of men in a town in the southwest who appreciated her general lack of morals.)
I never was with a woman when either of us was involved in another committed relationship while I was single; and my wife and I have always been "faithful"---another word that I think just marks the lowest acceptable level in a relationship.
I am a great enthusiast of marriage---I just don't think there is a better paradigm for maintaining and fostering the love and he relationship between a man and a woman.
I'm sorry you had to go through that with your first wife Tom it must've been difficult. I guess those hard times and getting divorced ended up leading you to someone more compatible. You sound like have a great connection with your wife. I guess there's a happy ending huh? Thanks Tom. : )
Benedict Arnold 