I have this friend i always sit with at the senior center, but lately she gets there before i do and she sits with this lady that id rather not sit with. this person does not know how to drive her scooter, back in january she drove it over my foot and left my foot swollen for months, it still hasnt totally healed yet, she did apologize but at the same time claimed she didnt have enough room to get by. last wk she pushed her scooter right into the table and almost tipped it over, today she did the same thing but not as bad, i dont want to be around this person, i dont feel safe, if i go get a drink or whatever i wont do it when shes driving around. im still mad about the episode where she ran my foot over but my friend somehow wants to sit with her constantly, id be happy if i never saw this person again. she didnt always used to sit with her but now shes constantly sitting with someone i dont want to sit with so how do i tell her this?
I'd tell her just like you told us. I don't see anything wrong with what you've said. It isn't hurtful; it's respectful of the friendship you have, and with the friendship your friend has with another.
Be whatever you choose as it may, it sounds suspiciously like your friend is trying to get the two of you to kiss and make up. :-)
Just be honest with her. I don't really think you can call her a friend considering how you feel about her anyway. Just start sitting elsewhere. Sounds like she already has someone else to sit with anyway. Stand up for yourself. You deserve to enjoy who you're sitting with and can't feel obligated to spend time with people you dislike.
you are soooo right!!!!!
remember, people treat you like you let them treat you!!!!!!!!!
so sit somewhere else from now on.....and meet other new people!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
It's a tough one because you don't want to put down her friend which may make your friend a bit defensive towards you. But you should be honest. Just let her know that you aren't comfortable with this other person and leave it at that.
Hopefully your friend will come around and start seeing what you already figured out about her friend. A yes, it sounds like this friend of hers is rather insensitive.
Just wait it out. I doubt she has much time left.
she has ms, how long do people live with that?
Tell her I would like your company but not your friend's. Simple. But you are never going to get what you are hoping for.
I think what you really want is for your friend to agree with you and not sit with her other friend. That is NOT going to happen. No one wants to choose between one friend over another; especially when one of the two friends is forcing her to make a choice. A choice that is totally awkward for her.
I know that I wouldn't do it if I were her. I don't appreciate people dictating what I do. I'm sure she won't like to be placed in this position, she likes this woman even if you do not. This is awkward for her. What is she supposed to do? You expect her to SOLVE this issue and tell her friend she chooses YOU? Not happening.
As I see it you have two choices. Either eat alone or get over it and try and get along with this other woman.
I would rather eat alone. I do it all the time. I would rather read a book and enjoy my meal than sit with someone that is giving me heartburn.
When your friend asks why, then you can explain. I would not tell her beforehand. I would just not join them. They will figure it out. Then the choice is up to your friend and you did not force the issue on her.
Just don't sit with her. She'll ask you about it and then you can say to not be offended but you choose to steer clear of the reckless scooter lady.
