I think there are infinite kinds of tension, not just the singular insecurity that some people have about not being able to live up to other's expectations. Certainly, it's always easier to relax if a person is just being his or her authentic self.
What's more complicated is that we are a social species. We do have to suppress inappropriate urges. For instance, every man knows it is generally rude and offensive to make a pass at a stranger or co-worker and it could get him into a lot of trouble. He might suffer some tension from unsatisfied biological needs, but it need not last long because he can always satisfy himself once he's back home and alone. Learning how to live with and handle various kinds of tension is just a normal part of being human, sane and well adjusted.
This post was edited by inky at January 1, 2019 9:36 PM MST