.
How appropriate is it to dictate how parents raise their kids?
But in any case, who gives the complements is irrelevant. Complements must be EARNED.
Bragging, in my opinion, is always rather inappropriate. Children deserve to be stimulated for their virtues, but doing so in private should show them greater, heartfelt affection. Otherwise it just comes across as a competition concerning which parents have the "best" children--mine often embarrassed me that way when I was a kid. Boasting about one's own children usually ends up making it seem like the caretakers are ultimately more important and commendable than they.
Hi there DG! Thank you for your thoughtful answer. I agree with you that at home parents need
to instill confidence in their children and let them know they are okay. But in public? I think children should be taught that modesty and humility are very attractive qualities to have and bragging is a sign of being very needy for attention/acceptance. Thank you for your reply and Happy Thursday! :)
Agreed, Rosie. Nice seeing you again after I've been rather quiet for a while around here; thank you and Happy Thursday!
I think parents sharing stories together about their kids is all right. But yeah, there's a line when it becomes bragging. And when all a parent has to talk about is their kids, which seems to be the case with some people I've known, it makes me think they have way too much invested in their kids' lives, instead of their own. Makes a person somewhat dull and sad in my eyes. And can possibly put an unhealthy amount of pressure on the kids as well.
I am a mother and I admit it gets on my last nerve to see someone do it on a constant basis. Not everyone has a beautiful, talented scholar on their hands. Some parents have children with serious disabilities and it can be a lonely world when you listen to the endless braggings of other mothers out there.
Yes, be proud of your child, but don't use them for bragging rites.
Well said Rosie. Modesty and humility are beautiful traits in human beings. If I teach my children that much, I will have done my job.
Hello there Rosie...
I am extremely proud of my children. Raising them has been, and is an amazing experience. When I think of everything we had to go through to get to where we are now I am filled with pride and joy. It impossible for me to suppress that feeling.
When asked how my kids are doing, I of course brag about their accomplishments and goals. By the way, my son has just completed his 4 year commitment to the Navy and is now planning his next step and my daughter is tearin it up down at Santa Barbara state University,UCSB
When I brag about my kids I am also throwing myself a nod. I consider my support and guidance for, and to them to be my greatest accomplishment. It has certainly been the most fulfilling experience of my life.
When I answer a question I stay away from assigning motive to the question. In this case however I will.
I have a feeling this question was inspired by Trump and his bragging on his children.
I have mostly seen this with his daughter Ivanka. I will say that no matter my feelings towards Trump himself, she seems to be an intelligent, compassionate, beautiful young woman, worthy of a fathers pride. I not only understand his complementing his children, I would do the same thing.
Having been a single dad who has raised a daughter, I will say a healthy father/ daughter relationship is very special. It is based on trust. A father has to build that trust over a lifetime. I respect any man who is capable of showing that kind of care, even if I don't particularly care for him otherwise.
I do agree that there is a balance between building our children up and keeping them grounded. As important as it is to teach confidence and self esteem, it is equally as important to teach empathy and compassion for others.
I also agree there are times when bragging on our own kids may be inappropriate, we don't want to overshadow the accomplishments of someone else's children, kind of like announcing your engagement at someone else's engagement party.
I also know your son to be an accomplished man. I know him to be friendly and open and very worthy of compliment. How, or why do I know this, in part because you did some bragging about him.
I guess how appropriate something is depends on ones perspective. A parent whose child was just arrested may not feel it appropriate to be a part of someone else's celebration over their child's accomplishment.
In any case,
Have a wonderful day m'dear
Seeing the comments it's not difficult to see why we're living in the age of underachievement and mediocrity.
