You are absolutely no help whatsoever. I’m adding your name to the list of defendants. Grrrrrrr.
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I know, right? Besides that, the waitress was Australian, so how can I be sure she wasn’t carrying trace amounts of Vegemite on her person or clothing or hair?
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It was a classic example of bait-and-switch. The avocado-laden attempt at murdering me was sprung upon me at the last moment after I had already been seated and lured into engaging in lively conversation on a variety of topics. The hosts then distracted me further by introducing subjects that called for deep concentration and little focus on peripherals. The plate full of poison was surreptitiously plopped under my nose during a spirited debate as to whether or not Australians have higher instances of high blood pressure due to their country being upside down, causing blood to rush to the head 24/7 (by the way, I argued in defense of you Aussies, I said it is a silly premise). They tried to sneak it in on me unnoticed, so I’ll gladly answer your countersuit in court with the satisfaction of being alive as opposed to having been done away with at the hands of underhanded opportunists. (I think they were trying to get my tilde collection. Grrrrrrrr.)
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