Wow! That took me by surprise - that anyone would even think of stealing them. I s'pose I've been naïve. When I've been too poor to buy gifts for friends, I've either made one or offered some kind of service like cooking a meal or weeding a garden.
Well back in them days I stole everthing and not just during the holidays. The real surprise is stealing helped me stop stealing. One day I stole a Uriah Heep LP that had the song Stealin on it and it made me start thinking. Cheers and Merry Chrirtmas!
I feel sad hearing that. Is it really hate, or do they simply avoid what doesn't fit their ideals or lifestyles?
Maybe I could try to understand you better.
I think you are a Christian and a conservative - but I don't know exactly what type. There are so many that it can make quite a difference to understanding what someone believes. What is your denomination and what are its tenets that make it different to others? Were you born into it? Or were you attracted to in later life? If so when and how? How does what you believe help to nurture your life and that of those around you? Are you actively a member of a particular congregation and community? Do you feel well connected and supported within it?
Who are the types who hate you? How do they express it? What do you do to set a boundary on their behaviours?
If I remember correctly, you now work as a personnel manager in an advertising or public relations company, and are fairly senior and very good at your job. Rather than going to uni, you worked your way up via direct experience. Back in the hippie days, you were a working girl. These days, you're married, and I guess might have adult kids.
What is there to hate about any of this?
I'm a liberal, leftie, greenie and an atheist - but I believe strongly in the right of others to follow the path that suits them best (so long as it causes no harm to themselves or others.) And I also strongly value the right to express and freely discuss anything so long as it doesn't cause or incite hurt or harm.
No don't be sad. We make our choices and live our lives and all is well and good in our own world but being exposed to the wider world such as is represented on a site such as this we realize the degree of hostility that is out there toward us and doesn't have to be just me but anyone. Not any environment for the faint of heart but some of us are less comfortable "giving as good as we get" - who knows? I try sometimes but just don't have the experience with constant conflict. I have and have had some good friends on here and I am allowed to be myself which is why I am here.
Right about many things. I am green as well. No don't have children of my own. My husband has two wonderful grown daughters so I am a "stepmother" but they now have lives of their own.
Goodness did not mean to make anyone uncomfortable. Thank you.
No - sadness is just sad - just a feeling - not necessarily uncomfortable. And it wasn't you that made me feel it - it was just how I reacted out of my programming. I was bullied at school, so I tend to feel it when others have also been on the blunt end of cruel tongues.
There is such vehement division in the USA between the right and left of politics, even just either side of the centrist line. I am constantly amazed at how intense it becomes. Likewise some of the conflicts I see between atheists, agnostics, theists and deists, and between evolutionists and creationists. There's less of in on the Mug these days, but it's still virulent on other sites - not just hate, but extremists on each side baiting and trolling each other - quite nasty and abusive - people who think anyone who doesn't think as they do must be a dumbwit. I often wonder whether these same people would be as foul in real life as they are behind the cover of anonymity.
I wonder whether some of the hate you've encountered is from people like these. I think, from what you've said, that the hate you meet is directed towards what they perceive as a type or an ideology - it's not actually personal towards you. Most likely they don't even know you, and if you were their neighbour they'd like you for your kindness, gentleness and humility.
There are ways of dealing with conflict. I admit I prefer to avoid it most of the time, and will certainly stay away from trolls. But sometimes we need strategies for conflict resolution, especially if it's someone we care about and with whom we need to get along in the long term. I'll wager a bet that managing personnel at work would probably involve a fair bit of that.
Do you enjoy your stepsons? Do they have families of their own now? Have you been seeing them over Xmas?
Well guess it is all part of life. Growing up we never had bullying so except for a few men I have not had to deal with that. Nor would I much care to. Of course there are occasional neighborhood pressures but generally we keep to ourselves and I have been active enough in town government that some people generally respect me thought they don't agree with my politics or don't care for my lifestyle. A site like this I can come on to and express myself without fear of actual reprisals though what I post many may not agree with. Important I think to do this lest others who may have the same beliefs or feelings or experiences think no one is like them. Just knowing others feel and do so many of the things I do has provided me with more confidence and emboldened me to talk about my own on sites such as this one. On answerbag we had many more participants so was relatively easy to find agreement for whatever points of you anyone brought to the table.
Some of the people on this site I have been dealing with for over ten years now and they can be perfect sweethearts on some things we agree upon. Conflict seems such a waste of time and I have avoided it as much as possible in my life. Not writing about little things like putting down the toilet seat or making the bed but ideological and emotional conflict. Which is I guess why I never married until I was 53. Though once came close. Close and comfortable and supportive relationships are such a gift why do we feel we need to challenge them on any grounds? Of course I realize this is an idealistic point of view. People are different and we have different beliefs and different ways of getting on in society. Natural I guess to look for support for oneself and one's beliefs among others.
Of course I see myself as perfectly reasonable and wonder myself why more people don't agree with me! But everyone has her or his own story and own experiences. Many of our neighbors do keep their distance for one reason or another but way it is in life on something we work together while on others we oppose one another.
At work I have been fortunate to as a corporate executive assistant to have the whole-hearted support of my boss and though have been some women here who have seemed to resent and oppose me at every turn they mostly don't last too long or move on or try to use their situation to their own advantage at the expense of the firm. I feel a great deal of loyalty to my company as most people there have been very good to me and have explained things to me when I did not understand and wanted me to do well. Has been over 31 years now and am probably looking at my last couple of years there but time will tell.
Stepdaughters. Kendra is 34 and married and working in a lab , has son Theo and another on the way. Marlene is 30 and living together and works for her mother and stepfather selling real estate. K and I hit it off immediately when I came on the scene but Marlene resisted me until living with us for a couple of years during which we came to an understanding. But both so busy with their own lives now we seldom visit any longer. Yes we had them with husband and boyfriend and stepgrandson for Christmas dinner along with Gerry's mother and his ex Hope their mother and her husband. Nice day and less work this year for me than the feeding of the thousand which had become customary once I married Gerry. So many people now afraid to visit.
Haha interesting because I cannot imagine you aspiring to modelhood. But back in the day, and please correct me if I am wrong, VS models were adults and not kids like I think they employ today. If we have the looks no reason not to try getting over with them. But I was always markedly deficient in that area so had to develop other ways of making myself acceptable. A woman I work with who was a model told me that at age 25 they are practically all done with runway work. I recently saw on the net where Ali MacGraw, who was a Vogue model I remember seeing on TV growing up, and I think Ryan O Neal Made a personal appearance in support of the 50th anniversary of the release of the motion picture Love Story. I never saw that until years later but interesting to me that he was the one supposed to be the "preppie" when in fact her whole looks screamed "preppie" to me. Guess I am not very good at imagination. I know I am not very good.
No, I would not want to be one of those models, I'd just like to be built like one of them. In my next life, I'm going to be much taller, my legs are going to go all the way up and my thighs aren't even going to know one another, let alone touch each other.
inky 