I'm guessing he's in his mid to late 40's to early 50's. I'm 26 (female).
It'll be two years next month that I've had my current job (at my local library). From the beginning this man has given me weird, creepy vibes, but in the last year, esp. the last 6 or 7 months, it's been amping up. The best way I know how to describe it is, he's using normal, innocent activities to cover up creepy behavior.
In general, he's always staring at/watching me, trying to be near me or in the same area of our huge work room as me, trying to get me to notice him, and letting out these loud, depressed sighs around me, among other things.
I avoid and ignore him constantly, and he even acts passive aggressive at times in response while we're working; yet it's like he still hasn't gotten the hint that I don't want to be bothered, like he's holding out hope I'll "warm up" to him eventually.
Some examples:
- Just a few weeks ago I was sorting a cart of books in our workroom. The table I (used to) sit at to do this has a sink nearby, where we can wash our hands, small dishes, or whatever. On this day, he came over to wash his hands at this sink *3 times* while I was sitting there working. And here's the thing-- *every time* he does this, he turns his head and just watches me while I work, the *whole entire time* he's washing his hands, taking his sweet time too. He's actually done this on multiple occasions, but this was the most excessive he's done it yet. I've always tried really hard to ignore it and focus on my work, but that was too much. I decided to stop sorting over there.
Then a couple days later, I was sorting in my "new location", when he decided to sit and eat his breakfast at the worktable directly across from it, sitting to where he had a direct view of me, instead of eating in our huge, 5 table breakroom that's barely ever occupied in the morning (where he normally goes). And since I was in the middle of my task, I couldn't just get up and move, so I had to sit there and ignore it while he ate and yeah, glanced at me ever so often.
- One morning I was on the computer before my shift started, and I saw him walk over to the workroom coat rack and start hanging stuff. But he was over there waaay longer than it takes to just hang something up and go about your business.
And the whole time, I saw him in my peripheral vision just staring/peeping out at me from behind the coats/coat rack, and standing right in front of where I'd hung my jacket, and I had a feeling that he was over there doing something weird, and acting suspicious in general.
After a couple more minutes he finally walked off, and then a while later when my shift was about to start, I went to my cabinet to put my phone away, and saw that he'd hung his tote bag on the same hook as my jacket... directly on my jacket. Out of all the other hooks he could've hung it on, he chose to do that.
I’ve worn that jacket in the workroom a lot, so I know he’s seen me wearing it enough to know it was mine. Like he wanted to force me to have to touch something of his (to remove it) if I decided I wanted to wear my jacket that day. I removed the tote, took my jacket off the rack, and put it in my cabinet. I haven’t used the coat rack since.
- I can't 100% confirm this because of facemasks, but I have a sneaking suspicion that he showed up one Sunday to another library I'd been drafted to work at. A few days before he'd been nearby, and therefore overheard me, telling another co-worker I'd be there that day. The Sunday comes, I'm on my way outside to empty the bookdrops, when I see a man on his way inside that's the same height, build, hair color, and everything as this co-worker. Then a little while later during the same shift, I was shelving books, when I happened to look up and see this man sitting up at one of the tables, just staring at me.
I haven't told anyone about this, though, b/c he hasn't done or said anything "reportable" or inappropriate. And everything that has happened, I feel he could either deny or play off as innocent. I've wanted to confide in other co-workers, but there never seems to be a right time. I've thought long and hard, for a long time, asking myself if I'm just being paranoid, making a big deal out of nothing, etc. He seems to be awkward in general, which I guess is part of the problem; he doesn't really speak unless spoken to, and even then doesn't offer much conversation. I have tried to give him the benefit of the doubt, but every time I do, something else happens that sets me back and reinforces in my mind that something's "off" about him. I don't want to create workplace drama, plus I'm worried about retaliation b/c as I mentioned, he already acts passive aggressive towards me because I don't give him the attention he wants.
It's occurred to me to even look for another job, but I really like working for the library and feel I shouldn't have to leave because of him. I have been holding out for a promotion/transfer opportunity as well, but I don't know how much longer I can keep waiting for that, while dealing with this....
What, no restraining orders? Grrrrrrrr.
:(
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Lol, I saw that too last night.
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Wait, where?
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