Welby, quit sending me these cans of food with the homemade labels that say “Surprise Stew”, “Not Mayonnaise”, “Harem Pot Pies”, “Anti-Vegemite”, and “Schmavocado Hash”. They all taste weird, I’m starting to lick myself instead of taking baths, I purr a lot, and I can’t understand why I want to chase birds every time I see them. Grrrrrrr.
~