Your operative contacts you and says, “It wasn’t Randy D we apprehended, he apparently had a stunt double. What shall we do now?”

  That’s an absolutely great plan, Janey Baby! If the authorities think I’m dead, it would automatically render every single one of those pending and standing restraining orders null and void! We could be each other’s arms by the end of the week!

 

  (Folks, I love the way this woman thinks things out way ahead of time!)
  ~

  The hours and hours of work that I have to put in at the Anti-Vegemite Import Department (A.V.I.D.) are far too important for me to get arrested on some silly fabricated charge of stalking, so it’s become necessary to send look-alikes to Minneapolis every now and then.


(Grrrrr.)
  ~

 Never fret, Baby, I always make sure you get the 100% original and genuine version, no replacement is good enough for you, Dear.

  
  ~

  There’s a whole lot of me packed into me, Baby.  Stuffed full of lust and loving, that’s what I am.

  
  ~