I have sensitivities, so the scent makes me sneezy, my eyes water, etc. and I break out in a rash when I touch the clothes. I asked my ex just to send their clothes home dirty and he okayed it. The kids have warned her. She still does it. Sometimes they come back as a hybrid between overly-potent detergent and cigarette smoke. It takes me dozens of washes to get the crap off their clothes.
Vote Now: Is She...
A) An evil B hell-bent on making me miserable.
B) A lovely, thoughtful lady who is trying to help and obviously doesn't understand that she's negatively impacting me.
C) Who cares what her motives are? Give her a new shirt covered in itching powder as a gift and see if she catches on.
D) Chill out JA. If this is your biggest problem with the chick, you're doing ok. Be quiet and go back to washing the clothes for the 10th time.
E) Something else. (Please explain.)
I don't mean to add wood to the fire, but I don't like her. She is insensitive. She has a sensitivity chip missing. If I knew you had issues, I would NOT do this to you. She could at least tell you to send your own detergent along with the kids and she can use yours. She could at least offer to do that one. There is no excuse for this except horrid BITCH.
Sorry. You know I am right.
What's her address? KIDDING!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Don't send any clothes when your children go visit their dad. He can buy them clothes for when they are with him. Your kids can wear home whatever they wore when they left. You can hose them off in the front yard before they enter the house. ;)
lol I love you, Sharonna.
lol Somehow I don't think that'll promote a healthy atmosphere between the two homes.
Well, she IS. 
RIght ON Thrifty. It is not good to put the kids in the middle, but something along those lines would do wonders. 
If the situation has been explained to her,A and a stubborn evil B at that!
That being said,C seems sooo appealing!So A and C! :O
I wasn't trying to be funny other than the hosing them off part, and they really could disrobe before coming into the house and you could take their garments straight to the washer. It seems to me a logical and easy way to completely eliminate the issue.
As a prankster by nature, I vote 'C' all the way.
But as a Mom, I have to go with 'E.' It pays to be the bigger person for the kids. Don't give her the satisfaction of knowing you made a big stink about it... no pun intended.
Instead, maybe you could send some clothes for the kids that will strictly serve them at Dad's? Punt-stunt neutralized; Mom takes the highroad (great example for the kids, Mom) and your former half owes you a solid in the future... The high ground feels good, right? lol
That said, if your allergies are that bad, the kids may have similar problems. If she causes a medical emergency for one of them, the gloves come off! I fully support taking her downtown in that situation!
lol I try not to think of her that way because, chances are, I'm stuck with her in our lives for a long time to come, but it's nice to have an outside party look at the situation and size it up that way. ;)
Yes, I know what you meant. You answer is perfectly logical, but I am wary of doing anything that could set off a dispute, so I'm willing to give a little to maintain the peace.
lol
E... she's trying to kill you and take your place. Don't let her do it JA!
Thank you, I think. It's nice to know that I'm not being a nutty ex, but at the same time... yikes.
Oh A because she sounds like a horrible person & C just because sometimes Karma needs a little help. I am sorry that you are experiencing this. I know plenty of people that suffer from sensitivities. I have a friend who has to be cautious around certain scents. She has to use a special detergent, no candles, no perfumes, ect. My son can't be around certain scents & I can't burn candles in my home.
I am not sure why some people have to be so inconsiderate towards others. That really just burns my bacon. I hope your situation does improve. Remember there is always option C. :)
I have talked to him a couple of times. We talked about the clothes initially, but the kids were also taking their comforters from their beds along- their request- they said it helped them sleep better because it felt more like home when they had familiar things. My youngest caught a stomach bug while there and the blankets pretty much had to be washed. My ex made a point of telling me what had happened and why he washed them, which I totally understood. No hard feelings whatsoever. So, there's no question that they know. When their bags come home, I'm so sensitive to it that I can smell it throughout the house and my allergies start up. (It's a sinus thing with the scent and a rash with direct contact.) Last time they came home, I smelled it right away and I asked and my daughter said, "So-and-so washed them again. We told her not to, but she didn't listen." I just told them it wasn't their responsibility- that I appreciated that they tried, but not to worry about it. I may wind up bagging their clothes when they come home, though, and just sending the same ones back if I have to. I will probably give my ex a head's up that that's what I'm doing so he gets it and there aren't any hard feelings.
Thanks. Yes, I may have to go with separate clothes.
You made a good point with the allergies being passed down, though. My oldest (now 18) has them and he's way worse than me. We have to keep benadryl at home all the time for his flare-ups. I don't think his started to show up until he was 8 or 9, so it's very possible my youngest two will develop them as well. At this point, the only seem to have seasonal allergies, but that could morph into what my oldest and I have soon. Yeah, if she sets anything off with them, the gloves will come off. It's one thing to mess with me, but the kids? Grr...
LMAO Well, this is the woman who had a lengthy affair with him while he was still my husband, so...
