Discussion»Questions»Relationships» Why do women doing online dating always list all the places they want to travel to? Your free, go travel. l'll date you after you get back.
It doesn't bother me at all. I just don't find it helpful info when trying to get to know someone or draws my interest to respond too it.
I'm kinda weary of online dating to begin with and for good, bad, or indifferent am always on the watch for what angle someone has when looking for an online match. I'm always questioning the possible motives of them being there. Suspicious nature getting the best of me possibly.
Fair enough I got tired of online dating too.. but did you see my point? As a woman who had reached a stage in live where I wanted to travel, not that I put it on the profile I don't think, then that's kinda an important thing for a prospective mate to know is it not? For me someone who didn't share that desire to travel, see new things, explore new places and try new things wouldn't have been suitable so I guess if I had put it there it would have been a good thing to know about me and for me to know about them? A story ... I had a *friend* he was kinda cool we get on really well and are attracted to each other, but.. but.. when I found out that he likes to vacation at home that was kinda a no no for me. I'd spent 30 years with someone who didn't want to travel so while I could travel on my own, having someone to share with was important to me. That wasn't the only reason but it was a big reason.. As I say I always did and always would pay my way.
I totally get your point and know that it's true for a lot of the people who did it. It's just that I think there's a lot of shady people on the net and side on the side caution when I tried online dating sites. That nagging feeling is why it didn't work well for me and I just moved on. Kinda like when you are approached by someone of the opposite sex( assuming you're straight) at nice, clean, respectable place you might not have the same guard up about being approached you would if it was at some seedy and grimy dive bar. The internet is like that seedy bar that puts me more on guard and makes me more suspicious. Even more so when I dabbled in dating specific sites.
Not every guy on them is just looking for quick dirty sex and not every women is a golddigger on them, however they do tend to have concentrated numbers of creepy a** men and women on them, or so I perceive. Then like anybody I have my personal insecurities I deal with that plays into some of those fears as well.
I get ya.. I was lucky that I have a good radar as I put it.. I never met anyone who scared me and wasn't nice.. I met a lot of nice people.. I steered clear of the bad ones, I appreciate it isn't always that easy though and I do think that it doesn't work for a lot of people, ultimately me too as it happens just not necessarily for same reasons.
The internet being the way it is and the way many people are that thought does come up as a likely possibility I'll admit. Though it's just a perception based in little proof from each person.
LOL you suspicious thing you :P I could drive to Europe in an hour or so, so def not looking for someone to pay and as I say i DO think you are being kinda negative..it's kinda wrong to just assume that.. shouldn't you get to know someone first and then see as it's kinda well... erm....sexist to assume that all women want men to pay..
Now now, I am sure you know that most women don't do that.. some do perhaps but most don't. I think tho trying to understand why they might do it, perhaps they want to demonstrate that they are not set in their ways, are up for new experiences and adventures.
I NEVER put where I wanted to travel on my dating profile, never even thought of it but I cannot lie it *was* and is one of my ambitions - to travel.. I can't speak for other women but I spent 30 years or so with someone who didn't want to travel and I suppose i wanted to make up for that by seeing as much as possible before I get too old! As I say I think I thought that it would be seen in a positive way as many men also want to travel and see things.. I met a fair few men who HAD traveled a lot already, I thought that was cool.
SO I am not really sure what your objection is? Is it that you *don't* want to travel? You hate the idea? or you think they want YOU to pay? I think if it's the latter you would most likely be wrong. I did travel to two places with two men I met online.. one was Amsterdam one was Lanzarote an erm naturist resort.. Loved both places and am so glad i went but I CAN assure you I paid my way on both occasions well ok on one I paid half but the other I was filling in for someone who couldnt make it so I didn't have to pay but I did pay for drinks and meals.
I am thinking.. maybe you should put on your profile that you don't want to travel as I think that's something women would want to know yes?
I guess I don't want to travel much, if I did I would go as a single man and have as much sex with as many different kinds of women as I could. I don't know what else I would wanna see out there.
Aww Pearl that's kinda a disservice to your own kind :( You wouldn't do it for that reason I am sure, so we have to believe that most other women are nice like us and would NOT hook up with a man just so he would pay for a vacation.
In fact I have been offered many vacations where the guy was happy to pay.. I said no thank you because I wouldn't want to be *bought* in that way.. so as I say we have to assume that most women are the same..
Ya know I do have a problem with when women attack each other.. I don't get it cos really we should all have empathy with other women, cos we are one too
Noper sorry.. I am very particular about these things.. perhaps I should have said.. it is generally the case that men do stick up for each other.. but it is a researched and accepted phenomenon that women tend not to do that.. they can be inclined to attack each other.. and put their own sex down. The theories given tell us that it's because women tend to see other women as potential competition.. so putting other women down, might, arguably make one seem better than the rest..
I am not sure I buy that entirely but I have observed the phenomenon a fair bit..
But as i say it isn't sexist to say that women should NOT attack other women... needlessly.. I truly don't want to offend or upset Pearl here, she's a nice person and I am sure she meant no harm in what she said.. I just pointed out that it would seem kinda .... putting other women down.. I am happy to discuss this in person whenever you wish but not sure I can really say much more here.
welllll you and Pearl are entitled to your opinions but since we know that at least one person wouldn't put it for that reason and I DID go to the trouble of explaining another explanation as to why they might put it on a profile.. then we really cannot assume that women do put it for that..
What's sexist is when we say women this or women that as if that applies to all. This is all the more so when it happens to be a negative thing.. like I could say why do men say they wan't *friendship* when they really mean free rides? But I truly wouldn't make that assumption that all men who say that mean something more obscure. Hopefully you can see what I mean..
lol maybe.. I tried to do a chat for you.. on this one tho depends on whether you mean the friends with women is separate to the sex with women :P as in not the same woman or women.. but the subject of friends and sex is a long debate.. women tend to be happy to be friends with men but generally speaking for women having sex with someone who is just a friend tends not to work long term.. or sometimes not at all, as they tend to be motivated more by feelings re sex. For sure I am not saying never... of course not but the tendency is for women is either there is no motivation or for them to develop feelings for someone they are intimate with over a period of time...if the man feels same way great.. but if not.. not good..
Men, according to the many men I have asked about this tend to find it more difficult to be *just* friends with women as generally speaking there is the tendency to want it to be more than just platonic friendship.. aka friends and sex is preferred usually.
I don't know. I got some kind off pop-up when I was awarded a message so I got scared off. Umm...after being married for10 years and together 15 I don't know muchmuchmuchmucesatated. Fu_k this phone!! Anyway I think people should just kiss and see from there. I
Benedict Arnold 