It seems to me that the people you only see at holidays are intent on impressing the family as to how wonderful his or her or their life(s) is going. Those who stay in touch all the time are actually friends, whereas the out-of-town-holiday-only-relatives are not in the loop of regular conversations and close relationships. For that reason I am able to tolerate certain behaviors from them that I would not tolerate from my close (relationship) relatives. I don't have a huge family so we are all pretty close.
This post was edited by Thriftymaid at December 15, 2017 6:12 AM MST
My family is repulsive. My brother, my surviving aunts and uncles and cousins are from another planet.
I don't spend any time with them ever and never want to even think about them. It is bad. I forgive them because they are too stupid to even know what they are.
Things like talking too much, or drinking too much would be a welcome fault compared to betrayal, ignorance and jealousy and just bitter resentment anytime that they do not get their way. They are people I don't miss and I don't lose any sleep over it. They are emotionally dysfunctional; this does a lot of damage to everyone. It is like mingling with the mentally ill.