I just slashed your tires. What did you do to me to make me do that?

You don't take to losing at video games very well.

Lmao! I do not. :0)

You thought I was dating your boyfriend.

You don't listen very well at all. I asked you to destroy it so I could get the insurance money. *sigh* I can't trust you with anything. 

Good help is hard to find.

~

I like a challenge. :0)

Just admit it! You were!! :P

Oh!!!!!! Sorry. :0(

Lmao! We all know why I slashed your tires... Cat stealer.

Which tires? That car is not mine.

Oops. *runs away*

You are voting for Trump, aren't you. 

Nope but I seen that secret Trump bumper sticker in the backseat of your car.

Listen, you're delusional. I can't just rip the divorce papers to shreds and magically make it disappear like you keep bugging me to do. It's a COURT ORDER! Judges sign these things and they're official. You and I are never getting remarried to each other.


Those tires will cost you $607.34.
:(

Well.

I NEVER.

607. 33

Stop padding the bill, that is why she dumped you in the first place, YOU. 

.34!

~

"I seen"?

The best divorce that money ever bought.

--

Instead of actually slashing the tires and being on the hook for the cost of four new skins if you get caught simply remove all four valve cores and set them neatly on the hood of the car. Same effect but no real damage to the property.

Someone actually did that in my neighborhood many years ago. Got up to go to work and all 8 tires were flat (two vehicles). Got to looking and noticed that everyone else on the block had the same problem. Looked at the tires to see where they were cut and discovered that they weren't. Then I noticed the valve caps and valve cores were missing. Couldn't find the caps or the cores but I had extras of each and an air compressor so I was back on the road in about 20-minutes. Just very happy that I didn't have to buy eight new tires.

I didn't do anything. Like I keep telling you, there is nothing going on between Randy and me. You are welcome to him.

(((((Good job, Jane S; I really think she bought it.  You are very, very convincing.  What's that?  Oh, sure, of course I'll meet you at our regular place, regular time.  Shhhhhh.)))))

~

Listen, you're delusional. I can't just rip the restraining order to shreds and magically make it disappear like you keep bugging me to do. It's a COURT ORDER! Judges sign these things and they're official. You and I are never getting married to each other.

W...wa...wai...wait, what just happened here? Who writes your lines? This material is lousy! I don't know which sophomoric, third-rate, low-budget screenwriter they scraped from the bottom of the barrel to bolster your character, but take it from a veteran performer, Kiddo, this business will eat you alive and spit you out if you settle for drivel like that.

Take my advice, Youngster, go to the director and the producers, DEMAND that they upgrade to a quality writer or you're walking. No, better yet, stop by my trailer and I'll go over a few ad-libs with you. Wear something that's easy to get out if; there will be many costume changes.
~