I grew up in a strict “Christian” household. I was taught that one should always ‘turn the other cheek’. My mom would say, “Always be patient with others as maybe they’re just having a bad day”. Dad would say, “Vengeance is mine, sayeth the Lord… and you ain’t the Lord”. We were also taught to follow the ‘golden rule’. To which came the question, “How come I have to live by that rule but no one else does?” Whenever any of us dared to ask this question, we always received the same answer, “if everyone else jumped off a cliff would you jump off too?” (BTW, ‘yes’ was never the correct answer). Yet when it came right down to it, my parents not only taught us all this, they lived it … which is rather impressive to a kid. So, all through my younger years I tried my hardest to be patient and kind to everyone – no matter how mean they were to me. I quickly learned that any fights I had at school would be met with a stern lecture about patience from mom, followed by an “applied” punishment by dad (it was just my luck that wide belts were the style back then). It wasn’t easy trying to be a “good kid” at school, but somehow I survived.
‘And the Lord said unto the a-holes, “be fruitful and multiply” – and they did!’
When it comes to being a-holes, kids have nothing on adults. After I graduated from college, I got a job as a bagger at a local grocery store. Now I knew kids could be a-holes, but I thought when they “grew up” they’d be mature and leave those childish ways behind. Wrong! Adults are ‘ass-a-holics’ – totally addicted to being a-holes. I want to point out here that I’m a very shy and reserved person, so much so that even talking to other people is extremely difficult. Thus I was often the brunt of many a fellow-employees joke. One manager sent me to a neighboring store to get “shelf-stretchers”. When the guy stared laughing I realized that there was no such thing as “shelf-stretchers. Then I was told to go in back and get some “watermelon bags”… the a-holes did it to me again! Yet even though I wanted to, I didn’t retaliate. I simply turned the other cheek (although both cheeks did mutter a few choice obscenities under my breath). It wasn’t just employees, vendors and customers were a-holes too. Vendors acted as if they owned he place and would push you aside so they could go first down a hall or aisle. Customers treated you as if you were their own personal slave. Company policy be dammed! I wanted to take ‘em out right there on the spot. However, I refused to let them get to me; I would be the bigger man. I took a deep breath, muttered some obscenities about fornicating the horse they rode, and turned the other cheek.
Did you know that the human body has only four cheeks? Therefore technically, one can only ‘turn the other cheek’ so many times before they have to haul off and “set things straight”. We’ve all been there - even little ol’ shy me. Someone does us what we perceive as an injustice, so in order to set things straight (in our minds), we seek to take revenge on them. Yet vengeance never gets us anywhere. We take revenge on them so, to set the record straight, they take revenge on us. But then, we have to take revenge on them for taking revenge on us because we took revenge on them because we thought they wronged us. Now, they have to take revenge on us, because we took revenge on them, because they …. Confusing isn’t it? Yet on and on it goes; like an unending circle. The only way to break this circle is by turning the other cheek. Turing the other cheek also prevents the circle form forming in the first place. Is it easy to turn the other cheek? No. Human nature says we should be the one who comes out on top. Yet there’s no top to a circle. There can be no real winner. Even if you were to kill the other person, their family (or someone else) will seek revenge on you or your children. Then they must take revenge … it’ll go on forever until either everyone’s dead, or someone finally turns the other cheek. The choice is ours.
“But I say to you, do not resist an evil person. If someone slaps you on your right cheek, turn the other to him also.” – Jesus (Matthew 5:39)
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