What “old person” things do you do?

I have to say things out loud so I will remember them. 

I like to see if I can put my shorts on standing up one leg at a time while balancing on the other without falling over too many times. 

I read the obituaries first. I spend more time in a recliner. I forget my name, your name, everybody's name. I get up to go across the room to fetch something and by the time I get there I've forgotten what it was I went for. I lose a train of thought in mid sentence. I can more readily talk my way out of physical activity. I leave my dentures in water by the sink, as I don't really care if they're in my mouth or not. I feel that I have a copyright on some of this stuff I'm talking about as I've seemed to have perfected most of it, but I don't get any royalties from the franchising. 

I tell people my weight loss goal is to be able to trim my toe nails and breathe at the same time.

And I forget how many times I have repeated that joke.