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Discussion » Questions » Humor and Jokes » Who'll come a-waltzing my Tilde with me?

Who'll come a-waltzing my Tilde with me?

Get it?

Posted - February 1, 2018

Responses


  • 2052
    me, me...pick me. 


      February 1, 2018 5:56 PM MST
    2

  • 5354
    Hmmm, wearing trasbabags or dancing with tildes. Which am I most egwer not to do? thankfully I dont have to do either.
      February 1, 2018 6:16 PM MST
    1

  • 6988
    I'll be there once I tie me kangaroo down, sport!
      February 2, 2018 12:13 PM MST
    4

  • 6477
    That's really clever :)
      February 2, 2018 2:24 PM MST
    1

  • 3523
    Thanks!
      February 2, 2018 7:41 PM MST
    1

  • 22891
    not me
      February 4, 2018 4:54 PM MST
    0

  • 16781
    I don't want to be haunted by those ghosts I heard as I passed by a billabong, so I'll pass.

    When I was a young man, I carried a pack
    And lived the free life of a rover
    From the Murray's green banks to the dusty Outback
    I waltzed my Matilda all over
    Then in 1915, the country said, "Son,
    There's no time for roving, there's work to be done."
    So they gave me a tin hat, and gave me a gun
    And sent me away to the war

    And the band played "Waltzing Matilda"
    As our ships pulled away from the quay
    And amidst all the cheers, the flag-waving and tears
    We sailed off to Gallipoli

    How well I remember that terrible day
    When our blood stained the sand and the water
    And how in that hell that they called Suvla Bay
    We were butchered like lambs at the slaughter
    Johnny Turk, he was waiting, he'd primed himself well
    Showered us with bullets and rained us with shell
    And in five minutes flat he'd blown us to Hell
    Nearly blew us right back to Australia 

    And the band played "Waltzing Matilda"
    As we halted to bury the slain
    We buried ours and the Turks buried theirs
    Then we started all over again

    And those who were left just tried to survive
    In a mad world of blood, death and fire
    And for ten weary weeks I kept myself alive
    While the corpses around me piled higher
    Then a big Turkish shell knocked me arse over head
    And when I awoke in a hospital bed
    I saw what it had done - and wished I was dead
    Then I knew there were worse things than dying

    So I'll go no more waltzing Matilda
    All through the green bush far and free 
    For to hunt and tent peg, a man needs both legs
    No more waltzing Matilda for me

    They collected the wounded, the crippled and maimed
    And shipped us back home to Australia 
    The armless,  the legless, the blind and insane
    All the brave, wounded heroes of Suvla
    And as our ships pulled into Circular Quay
    I looked at the place where my legs used to be 
    And thanked Christ there was nobody waiting for me
    To grieve, to mourn and to pity

    And the band played "Waltzing Matilda"
    As they carried us down the gangway
    But nobody cheered, they just stood there and stared
    Then they turned all their faces away

    So now every April I sit on my porch
    And watch the parade pass before me
    And I see my old comrades, how proudly they march!
    Reviving old dreams and past glories
    But the old men march slowly, their bones stiff and sore
    Tired old men from a tired old war
    And the young people ask, "What are they marching for?"
    And I ask myself the same question 

    But the band plays "Waltzing Matilda"
    And the old men still answer the call
    But year by year, more old men disappear
    Soon no one will march there at all

    Waltzing Matilda, Waltzing Matilda 
    Who'll come a-Waltzing Matilda with me?
    And their ghosts may be heard as you pass by that billabong
    "Who'll come a-Waltzing Matilda with me?"
      February 4, 2018 8:20 PM MST
    1