Obsessive texting and finding frivolous reasons to communicate with someone outside of the relationship.
This post was edited by O-uknow at July 24, 2018 6:26 AM MDT
Had no idea, before I started in net chat groups nine years ago, just how obsessed so many people seem to be with "cheating". Which term suggests to me, on the one hand, playing some kind of game and not following the "rules" of that game. And, on the other, a desperate finally futile effort at trying to control the behavior of others. Seems to me that in a close relationship we are naturally going to fear anything that think will or does threaten the security which we derive from that relationship and so it is there things we tend to deem "cheating". So would pretty much run with whatever our fears are. Much of my life I saw myself as rather too plain and ordinary that anyone would really ever want to commit to me for anything longer term than say a year or so. So I was pleased with anything that was steady and rewarding that did come my way but felt it would not be very lasting because I was just not interesting enough so they would eventually become bored with me and naturally start to pull away. At which point, when I could feel that, I would most always put an end to it. When I knew they were either not so interested in me any longer or were more interested in others. Which of course made my relationship no longer secure. For me it mostly came down to their spending lass and less time with me and more and more with others which was pretty obvious. So I guess it is like if I can no longer be #1 then I no longer want to play.